John the Revelator

Coverage of Victoria's Secret fashion show

2012-01-26T21:47:00.000-06:00

You may be asking yourself why John the Revelator is posting a blog about a fashion show. The connection may seem tenuous, but consider this. Fashions shows, like karaoke, are all about people getting up on stage and making a fools of themselves to music. The only real difference that I can see is that fashion models don't have to be drunk.

I hope these photos that I purloined from Fox News will give you a taste of what the tasty and tasteful ladies will be wearing to the bedroom this coming year. I know I am looking forward to my wife, the Gypsy Songstress modelling these for me!

Starting off the show, we see this refined assemblage of bewitching underthings coupled with an understated Bozo wig. Turquoise and coral with cyan have always been my favorite set of clashing colors.

Next on the runway, we see an equally appealing collage of discordant colors in this combination super-hero costume and para-sailing outfit. Holey Underwear, Batman!

If you are like me (and let's face it, who isn't?) you probably have a thing for fairies. I mean the kind that run around the woods at night, half nekkid, of course. Wait a sec... I have seen both kinda of fairies doing that. If that's your thing, then you will be glad I included a picture of this enchanting outfit.

And what lingerie ensemble is complete without dual shoulder-mounted parasols to protect those delicate dual shoulder-mounted shoulders from the scorching sun while she walks her dog through the boudoir.

I am proud to say that the dog she is walking is actually our very own shitsu-bichon mix, Truffle. He enjoyed the dog walk on the cat walk so much that he didn't mind having to swallow that pesky umbrella that is poking out of his tummy.

Next up is Stella, looking like a stellated icosahedron in heels. And feathers. Yes. Feathers are always a nice touch.

We have here a darling lady who decided to embroider her Mousketeer ears, and add ribbons. Annette Funicello, eat your heart out.

The outfit below won the hard-fought contest for the most daring use of colors that really don't go together. Ever. This coveted prize was presented by Stevie Wonder.

As I said, these photos are provided by the largess of Fox News. And speaking of largess, I would like to end this charming exhibitionist exhibition with the largess-est of all. What woman would not love to accentuate her caboose with this outfit that is just too-too much. This will definitely be in the package arriving at my doorstop. I cannot wait.

US karaoke listings

2011-09-26T01:33:00.000-05:00

I stumbled across a useful site today. This site lists karaoke venues all across the US:http://www.karaokeacrossamerica.com/

The site is attractive and quite user friendly. You give it a location (City and State) and you get a map and a listing of karaoke within a given radius.

I applaud the efforts of Steve Hess to help everyone find their karaoke fix.

If you like the site, it is time to get busy. Currently, there are (I think) about 1200 listings in his database. But, he only shows 2 of the 199 listings that I have on my website. Enter your favorite gigs. Many hands make light work.

The Soundies

2011-08-07T22:20:00.004-05:00

Before MTV invented the music video, there were the soundies. In the early 1940's, soda shops and nightclubs had a box called a Panoram. For a dime, you could watch a loop tape with eight music videos on this video jukebox.

I have collected a few soundies below for your delectation. My thanks to the American Jazz Museum in Kansas City for their exhibit on Soundies.

Here is one of my favorite karaoke numbers: Minnie the Moocher, by Cab Calloway.

Here is another song that I love. The harmony of the Jordanaires is just crazy. I am sure a musicologist would be able to tell you something like "they make extensive use of the flatted fifth". I dunno. I just think it sounds cool. Juke Box Saturday Night, Glenn Miller

Here's a song that I think I need to learn: Caldonia,by Louis Jordan.

I first heard the Bette Midler version of this song. One one way, it's sad that Midler basically stole the song - offering very little creative input. On the other hand, it got me to know the song and the Andrews Sisters' harmony. And Bette Midler has always been a heartthrob for me! Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy, as performed by the Andrew Sisters.

There was some jitterbugging in Juke Box Saturday Night, but the dancing in Hellzapoppin' is completely awesome.You have to see this to believe it.

Duke Ellington - what more can I say? Here is Cottontail, with more gymnastic dancing.

Here is another song that I first heard from a more modern group. The Manhattan Transfer did this song back when I was first listening to music. Here is the Nat King Cole trio doing Route 66. You gotta love Nat's smooth vocal stylings.

 Well
That's the end of the reel... time to insert another dime!

Two Duck Feet hit the road!

2011-07-28T18:59:00.000-05:00

Back in mid-June, I officially announced that I had hung up my karaoke jockey mic. I intimated that something was going to fill that void, but at the time, I was close-lipped about it. It's time to lift the tarp and have a look at what I have been hiding. Here it is:

A duck? What?

This is not just any duck. This duck is the logo and mascot for our new business venture. My wife (Madelaine, the Gypsy Songstress) and I have started the company Two Duck Feet. Our goal is to provide website development for small companies that see the need for a website that is distinctive, but yet competitively priced. Getting you feet on the web...

Visit our site. Tell us what you think. And help us out... We are looking for a name for the mascot!!

Thanks for everything, Julie Newmar!

2011-07-25T21:13:00.002-05:00

Google Analytics is a great toy. I use it to track the number of visits that my websites get. This particular blog (http://john-the-revelator-does-karaoke.blogspot.com/) is pretty busy, I am proud to say. Since January, this blog has been visited by 3,007 different people from 1,457 different cities in 111 different countries. I have had visitors from every state in the nation, with the exception of Alaska. Sarah is just not that big into karaoke, I guess.

I just noticed something odd, though. A post of mine from the beginning of April suddenly started getting a lot of visits.

From the date I posted (April 3, 2011) to July 22, the page was viewed a total of 177 times by 108 different people. That's kind of impressive, but not totally surprising. I mean... it's about Julie Newmar! And patents! What could be a better prescription for a popular blog post?

But on July 23rd, it took off. There were 27 page views on that one day, and 37 on the next. As I write this (July 25 at 8:30 PM) there have been 15 today.

It is not totally weird for a page to get that many visits. I have a number of popular posts: My post on tele-osculation devices has seen 258 visits in the last month. And nobody even knows what that word means!

What is weird is that it suddenly took off. Up until the beginning of July, the site had not seen more than 9 visits in a day. Holy blog post about Julie Newmar, Batman! I need to get to the bottom of this! Why am I suddenly getting so many visits? Could this be the work of the Riddler????

My fingers flashed over the keys at the Google Analytics site. I quickly found that this was probably not the work of one person. The visits came from 62 different cities, with Oxnard, CA, Louisville, KY, Dunn Loring, VA and Parsippany, NJ heading up the list. I am hard pressed to see a pattern.

It occurred to me to check the news to see if Julie Newmar happened to have been in the mews - excuse me - the news recently. Sure enough. I found that, along with Adam West and Burt Ward, she spoke at Comic-Con in San Diego on July 25th, celebrating the 45th anniversary of the Batman TV series.

So, I missed by big chance to see Julie in person. I could have gone to San Diego. Of course, I would have been mostly bored by the conference cuz I am not really all that into comic books. But... I hold on to the hope that Julie herself might read this blog post and send me an email. Maybe she will visit Milwaukee and we can go to Starbucks and talk about patents?

Then again, maybe this post is all about the power of the internet to connect things and also about how to get your website noticed. That part is kinda cool.

Passing the baton...

2011-06-12T21:56:00.000-05:00

I got into this hobby job -- being a karaoke DJ -- a bunch of years ago. I described the start in my first blog. I chronicled the start in two more blogs: Singing to the Choir, and Encouragement from my Wife.

I had a lot of fun in this hobby job. Hobbies are supposed to be fun, right? And it's great when you can earn enough money at a hobby to buy the toys that you need to do that hobby. That I did.

But, it was not about making money. And it wasn't even so much about singing karaoke. I could have sung karaoke at any number of places any number of times per week without having to schelp several times my weight in equipment.

It was about people.

I remember vividly a dream that I had while still in high school. I was at a bar (go figger) and Mr. Dumbrowski (proprietor of the bar affectionately known as Dumbo's) was talking to me. "Life..." he said, "... is pipple. Jus' pipple. Thas it." He held his fingers together, holding his hand up as he said this. Then he poured me another tap beer. I'm not sure what the beer symbolized in the dream. Clearly, it symbolized something else that's important. A few more years of therapy, and perhaps I'll figger that one out?

This blog marks the ending of another era in my life, the ending of the "John the Revelator, KJ par excellence" era. I am stepping aside, and passing the mantle on to a very good friend of mine, Anthony "Sven" Chojnacki. Anthony knows that it's all about pipple. That's how I knew I could pass the business along to him. I invite you to have a look at his site, just unveiled this week.

What's next for me? Stay tuned for the next blog post!

Jack Black karaokes for UNICEF

2011-05-28T06:00:00.000-05:00

He played a rocker wannabe in Tenacious D in The Pick of Destiny. He played a rocker wannabe in The School of Rock. He played rocker wannabe Paul McCartney in Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story.

Yes, I am talking about Jack Black. It should not be a surprise that he sang a little karaoke for the recent UNICEF benefit. The pic is of him singing War Pigs from Black Sabbath.

Karaoke Suicide - the play

2011-05-26T06:00:00.009-05:00

I missed this play: Karaoke Suicide is Painless. I kick myself. But, I was busy that night. Or maybe I wasn't in Seattle? I don't remember. April was sooooo long ago.

The play is described as "A multimedia karaoke comedy that explores the correlation between air guitar and personal choice." That sounds like my kinda stuff. Intellectual and stupid at the same time.

This is a pic of the actress, Teri Wegant. It really looks like I missed out. I understand that she was in Cider House Rules (I loved the book and was disappointed by the movie.) and also in The Search for Intelligent Life in the Universe. My daughter did a reading from this Lily Tomlin book when she was in high school, so I have a deep personal connection.

The judge at the forensics meet did not give her the grade that my daughter deserved, by the way. My theory is that crazy people make judges uncomfortable. Like, it's too close to their own inner outer-limits? I have no clue what that means, but I thought I would throw it in just in case someone thinks I'm brilliant.

Terri Wegant is holding a Shure SM58 mic, BTW. Oh, and she got a great review for the one woman show.

You know... I may have come off sounding a bit sarcastic about the play? Seriously... I do wanna see it. Someone bring it to Milwaukee, ok? Or Madison. I'd drive to Madison to see it. Meet me there. We'll go to Karaoke Kid after and have a good time on State Street, having gyros and way too much beer.

Sigh... just before I posted this blog I heard about yet another karaoke play that I missed, this one in Bloomfield, NJ. This one is a murder mystery, entitled "Karaoke Kills".

Various Paradises

2011-05-24T23:39:00.003-05:00

It all started with Bach's Prelude #2 in C minor.

At least, that's what Wikipedia has to say about Stevie Wonder's song: "[Pastime Paradise] drew on the first eight notes and four chords of J.S. Bach's Prelude No. 2 in C minor (BWV 847)"

I had to listen to both songs many times to finally get it. It's there, though. Same chords. But I dunno. Did Stevie Wonder about Johann Sebastian's Box? It seems a bit of a stretch.

Pastime Paradise is track 8 on his Songs in the Key of Life album, which was released in 1976. Rolling Stone ranked this album 56 on their list of 500 greatest albums of all time. I have that album. The song caught me the first time I heard it.

What does the song mean? Back in those days (I should explain), songs had to mean something. ABBA came out with Dancing Queen in that year, and, speaking of Queen, Bohemian Rhapsody came out that year as well. I tell ya, songs meant something back when I was in high school.

Here is what Rolling Stone magazine had to say about the meaning of the song -

"Pastime Paradise sounds like a parody of a well-meaning protest song with its meaningless shuffle of words ("Consolation/Integration/Verification/of Revelations ... Though the words to "Pastime Paradise" may make you want to run from the room, the music will keep you there."

Nice. Remember, these were the guys who put the album at #56?

Rolling Stone may not have thought much of the lyrics, but I find meaning in them.
"We've been spending too much of our lives
Living in a pastime paradise
Let's start living our lives
Living for the future paradise"

In 1995, Coolio did a rap remake of the song. In his version, the words are less hopeful. And it comes along with an admonition for young black men.

I know it may be hard, but try to see past the silly hairdo and listen to the depth of the words:
"Tell me why are we, so blind to see
That the ones we hurt, are you and me"

When this version came out, I instantly recognized it. Of course, in 1995, our electric toothbrushes and sandals didn't come with Google search apps installed. Back in those days, we had our internet delivered to our doorstep every morning.

So it took me a while to track it down. But when I did, I dusted off the turntable and played it for my daughters. If you can say nothing more of my fathering skills, I took my kids' music education seriously. From the way they rolled their eyes, I could tell that they were very proud to have a father who was practically a professor of musicology. Or, maybe they just saw me as a fat old man trying to convince them that the 70's were cool?

Then, of course, Weird Al made a parody called Amish Paradise. This continues to be a popular karaoke song. In some circles, anyway.

What brought this all up? A good friend of mine, Steve, sent me this video. He knew that I would enjoy the song, since I am also a bearded, singing scientist who is just a bit nutty. Steve did not know my rich history with previous versions of the song.

You may not recognize the rapper in the video. He is IBM Fellow Dr. John Cohn. He is actually a very good speaker and a champion of the cause for getting kids interested in being engineers. If this video can reach just one aspiring rapper and inspire him or her to take a serious look at MIT...

Penelope Cruz - Karaoke junkie

2011-05-24T06:00:00.014-05:00

Who woulda believed it? Penelope Cruz? Karaoke?!?!?!

Here is a quote from her:
"I've gone to karaoke bars in almost every city I have been to. Every time I am on a movie location, we find a karaoke bar and take the crew out."

And another:
"I have a karaoke machine at home. I'm one of those people who do it by themselves when they are alone and I'm not embarrassed to say it."

Her go-to artist? Eminem.

But can she sing? Her singing voice was dubbed in the movie "Volver", but here is a clip of here singing in Nine.

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But can she sing? I'm having trouble paying attention to the music.

More Charlie today than yesterday

2011-05-22T06:00:00.002-05:00

Tonight, my wife was watching an old episode of Ally McBeal. A song was performed that caught my attention. It's called More Today Than Yesterday. It was released in 1969 as a one hit wonder for the one hit wonder group Spiral Starecase. (Tell the spell checker to shut up, cuz this is the proper misspelling of the group's name.)

Anyway, I like the song. I liked it so much that I dug up the karaoke version, thinking, "I can make that song sound good!" My intuition about this sort of thing isn't always the best. Especially when it comes to trying to sound like guys with really really good very high ranges.

After I decided that this was a song that I could not possibly make sound good, I inexplicably started humming a song from a commercial from way back. A catchy tune... upbeat, jazzy. Sung by Bobby Short. It was from a perfume commercial. How catchy was it? It was released as a 45.Yes, a song from a commercial became a 45! No, I am not talking about I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing, but that's a good guess.

How catchy was the song? I have not heard it since 1976 (back when they still sold 45's), but I still wake up whistling it every morning. Talk about an ear worm!

By now, I am sure I have everyone whistling the song from the Charlie commercial by Revlon.

But was the Charlie song a parody of More Today Than Yesterday? You be the judge.Try singing "Every day's a new day." and then sing "... and they call it ... Charlie." I dunno. Call me meshuga, but I think the songs fit together.

In 1993, Revlon came out with another music video perfume commercial for Charlie fragrance. This time they picked the inimitable Little Richard (who I like to imitate, by the way), and paired him up with the gorgeous Cindy Crawford. This time they end in a parody of Little Richard's hit "Good Golly... Charlie... Good Golly .. Charlie."

Gosh darn it, that was fun.

Put down that duckie!!!

2011-05-17T22:51:00.002-05:00

I was reminded today of a music video that I saw years ago. The music video might well be my favorite music video of all time. At any rate, it is my favorite music video of today. It features one of my all-time favorite Muppets, Ernie.

And it also features an incredible cast walk-ons, including: Itzhak Perlman, Rhea Perlman, PeeWee Herman, Jane Curtain, John Candy, Winton Marsalais, Joe Williams, Paul Simon, Woodie Guthrie, Dannie DeVito, Jeremy Irons, Ralph Nader, and last but certainly not in any way least, Madeline Kahn.

Here is the video. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did today.
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Oh... and not only that, there is an Israeli version of the song under the title "Sim Et Barvazi". The DVD version is bound to be a big hit for Christmas, so order from Walmart early!

Just in case you were wondering, Celia Cruz sings this in Spanish: "suelta el paquito".

Sheep thrills and the tele-osculation device

2011-05-07T12:15:00.000-05:00

The Gypsy Songstress and I have a little running joke about sheep. They're so cute -- they serve as a symbol of our cuddly relationship. When I go on a business trip without her, my wife will hide a stuffed sheep in my luggage to remind me of her.

The last time we sang "Embraceable Ewe" in a performance, my loved one brought out a little stuffed sheep during my solo part. Silly. When I get email from this delightfully playful woman, she will sometimes sign off with "Love, Ewe". She is my cuddly ewe.

Those of you who have Google mail will know that Google quite thoughtfully provides you with context sensitive ads. That's a polite way of saying that it enhances its ad revenue by displaying ads that are likely to have a higher click-through ratio. It does so by skimming through your emails for keywords that suggest you could have an interest in a certain product.

[Let me point out... The folks at Google are not reading your emails. There is no fellow in the email room at the Google office sniggering over your repeated mispelling of the word "mispelling". Or being titillated by your description of making a peanut butter sandwich. It's all done by a sniggering computer.]

So naturally, when I email my buddy that I just bought a 2 terabyte drive from Tiger Direct, gmail will show me an ad for the 2 terabyte drive that I just bought from Tiger Direct, knowing full well that I will click on the ad to buy another one for my buddy. Gmail knows that I am just that kind of guy.

But Google doesn't always get it right. Somehow it always misses the comma in the last phrase of the email from my wife: "love, ewe". It is intended to mean, of course, "I love you, and I am your cuddly female sheep". Google regularly places an ad for the Love Ewe on my gmail page. "We fully intend that the Love Ewe be used solely as a gag gift or home adornment." Such cute eyes.

Somehow, a little Gershwin tune keeps going through my head: "Embrace me, you sweet inflatable ewe..."

Let me point out... this has nothing to do with inflatable guitars. And nothing at all to do with a recent post on my other blog. Inflatable stuff is just not on my brain, ok? This is not an obsession of mine. Really. I don't spend all day playing one of the inflatable guitars from my large collection. Or my inflatable saxophones. The inflatable maracas are kinda cool. And I don't even own an inflatable love sheep. At least not yet.

SO... today's topic is "How to use technology to keep the fires burning when you are on a business trip". You can sneak a stuffed lamb into your loved one's luggage to remind him of your undying love. You can (as I have often done) pick up a little stuffed sheep as a gift to remind her that the undying love is reciprocated. You can of course, make economical use of the limited space in a suitcase and pack a Love Ewe. And of course, in the interim, email is a good way to let the other know you are thinking of them.

Technology is so cool when it comes to helping requite long distance love.

Skype is of course another great way to keep in contact. Skype was indispensable on my recent trips to Berlin and Liverpool where my cell phone didn't work. (Us applied mathematician karaoke DJs really do get around!)

Skype also improves on the cell phone experience by adding video. Now, I have not tried one particular thing on Skype video, but I understand from a friend who knew someone who had this cousin... that video Skyping can be used in much the same way that the Love Ewe has not been recommended to be used. I do not endorse this activity, since it is probably regulated by the FCC. In much the same way that the FCC prevents the internet from sharing certain types of images that would have made your grandmother blush.

And that brings me around to the news item that got me going on this topic: the invention of a tele-osculating device. As you can see by the picture below, this very romantic device will allow you to share that ultimate intimacy, a kiss, with your loved one over the internet.

I'll take a set of those, and one of them there blow up sheep. I have another trip to Berlin planned for this fall.

This is your brain on karaoke

2011-04-25T06:45:00.000-05:00

Here is another great news story that you may have missed. At least if you are not part of the "in" crowd for karaoke brain research.

Researchers asked subject to sing karaoke while being recorded. The researchers then had them watch the films and hear themselves sing. Meanwhile, the researchers monitored the subjects for signs of embarrassment.
The more damage participants had in the area of the front part of the brain called the pregenual anterior cingulate cortex, the less mortified they were about their singing.

Interesting. People get embarrassed when they sing karaoke? Never happened to me!

A week earlier, I had stumbled upon another article about the anterior cingulate cortex. I understand Time magazine will be doing a feature story on the ACC, since it is rapidly becoming the most popular brain structure.

This other article summarized a research paper where they quizzed a group of volunteers concerning their political leanings, and then did a little brain imaging. Here is where they talk about our favorite part of the brain:

Liberals are linked to larger anterior cingulate cortexes, a region that "monitor(s) uncertainty and conflicts," it said.

"Thus, it is conceivable that individuals with a larger ACC have a higher capacity to tolerate uncertainty and conflicts, allowing them to accept more liberal views."

I am trying to put this all together now... People with damage to the ACC aren't embarrassed by singing karaoke... People with a smaller ACC tend to be more conservative... Ummm... Here is my conclusion -

Avoid inviting Republicans who are poor singers to your next karaoke party.

Crack down on illegal karaoke houses

2011-04-22T06:42:00.000-05:00

This news story caught my attention. It's got is all: karaoke, parlor rooms with scantily clad women, illegal immigrants, $300 bottles of booze. I'm just sad to have missed visiting this place in Alexandria, a suburb of DC.

Was that a typo? Maybe I'm glad to have missed it... I quote from localkicks:

According to court documents, “High Society” (also known as “Tomato” and “Tomato Garden”) was a Korean karaoke bar/club that advertised as a “room salon,” a club containing private rooms where customers, primarily Korean men, consumed liquor. Provocatively dressed Korean female hostesses would serve the drinks to and then drink, flirt, sing, and dance with the customers. A bottle of liquor at High Society/Tomato typically would cost $300 and customers were required to purchase at least one bottle.

I dunno. The $300 minimum is not giving me such a warm fuzzy.

The owners were given light sentences but heavy fines for providing an illegal immigration service for the scantily clad Korean hostesses. They have had to forfeit $4 million in profits they have raked in over the past 4 years.

National Karaoke Week

2011-04-20T07:03:00.002-05:00

OMG! This one almost slipped through my fingers!

Today is the first day of one of one of the most important holidays in my universe. No, I'm not talking about Passover. That started yesterday.

I am talking about National Karaoke Week, April 20 - 26th, 2011. This national holiday is always the fourth week of April. I encourage everyone to go out and support your favorite karaoke joint. Here are some websites with more information:

http://www.nationalkaraokeweek.com/
http://www.holidayinsights.com/moreholidays/april.htm
http://www.zanyholidays.com/2008/04/national-karaoke-week.html

I also encourage you to give generously to DontStopBelieving.org. This organization has the charter to find a cure for one of the most devastating karaoke addictions in our modern times. People all over the globe are afflicted with an insatiable desire to sing Don't Stop Believin'. They miss work to go sing. They alienate friends and forsake loved ones. If you or someone you know has this debilitating addiction, please direct them to DontStopBelieving.org where they can find the help and support that they so desperately need.

Karaoke in Berlin, part 2

2011-04-19T06:00:00.007-05:00

While I was in Berlin, I heard about another karaoke venue that is not to be missed. Did I mention that I missed it? It seems there is a guy who started bringing karaoke gear on his bike to the amphitheater located at Mauer Park. Every Sunday, he shows up at the park and runs the Sunday Bearpit Karaoke Show. The attendance is over 1,000!

Here is another link where you can read about the Sunday Bearpit:

http://www.monstersandcritics.com/lifestyle/life/features/article_1632863.php/The-Sunday-Bearpit-Berlin-s-open-air-Karaoke-show

Next time I am Berlin, I will make sure this is on my tour.

Karaoke in Berlin, part 1

2011-04-17T20:03:00.000-05:00

I spent this last week in Berlin. Friday night I finally got a chance to feed my karaoke addiction. I visited The Green Mango with Hiroyuki-san. Naturally, if you are in Germany, you need to go there with a Japanese fellow.
The place was hopping. We were lucky to catch the place on a night where there was a bachelorette party. I dunno. Maybe there is some mixture of luck. There were a lot of lovely young ladies, but there was also a male stripper. Maybe it's just me, but I don't normally expect to see guy wearing only a hand towel on stage at a karaoke bar. Must be my strict upbringing!

The song collection is excellent. They claim to have over 150,000 songs. I'm not sure, I didn't count. The books were well put together, with all the pages in plastic cover sheets. I know from personal experience that this is a big pain and expense even for a "tiny" little library of 10,000 songs.

As for the singing... I was quite impressed with several of the singers. In particular, there was a fellow who did two Michael Jackson songs complete with the moves. Excellent. There were at least two others who were great singers.

It seemed to me that most of the songs were German pop songs which I was not familiar with. There were a number of songs that are popular karaoke songs in the US, like "Girls Just Want to Have Fun", and "You Raise Me Up". I was happy to see that one of my favorite numbers, "You're Just Too Good to be True", was well received.

Will I go back there? Yes... next September!

Julie Newmar

2011-04-03T13:43:00.000-05:00

Ok, so I know that Julie Newmar has nothing to do with karaoke, or even with singing. But... I found out something interesting about her, and I just have to share it with somebody!

Julie Newmar is of course known for her portrayal of Cat Woman on the Batman TV show. When I hear her name, that's what I remember. I was only eight years old when the Batman TV series came on, but somehow that face and that tight bodysuit made an impression on my pre-pubescent mind.

Another image of Julie Newmar was firmly lodged in my post-pubescent mind. This image was from People magazine in 1977. At that time, I was old enough to understand the word "sexy" as something other than an abstract concept.

Actually, I don't remember reading the article. In fact, I didn't associate her name with this image until I found it on her official website.

Have I gotten your attention? Ok. Now for the learning part. Julie Newmar was awarded three patents. Really. Notice the heading on the top of the page? Having trouble finding it? First look at her amazingly voluptuous tush. Then move your eyes slightly to the right and then up near the top of the image.

I am guessing most of the guys missed the word "INVENTORS". Probably because it's outlined text. But, I'm getting to a point here about her amazingly voluptuous tush. Why is her tush so amazingly voluptuous, you may ask? It has to do with two of Newmar's patents.

US Patents 3,914,799 and 4,003,094 are for "Pantyhose with shaping band for cheeky derrier relief". The patent issues the problem that "Usually the more flattening of the wearer's lower abdomen (tummy) that is achieved, the more tendency there is to flatten and denaturalize the wearer's derriere". Flat tummy, flat butt. Women who wear pantyhose generally want the tummy flat, but not the derriere.

The secret of this invention lies in "an elastic shaping band 21 (substantially more elastic than the fabric from which the panty portion 11 of the pantyhose ismade and typically of the same material as a conventional waist band) is connected to the rear panty portion 17 and extends from the vicinity of the crotch zone 16 to the vicinity 22 of the elastic waist encircling band 13." (Please refer to the image from the patent for the numbers.

Newmar's other patent (US 3,935,865) is for a brassiere. The purpose of this patent is thus: "Many women want to appear freer in their movements and to give a braless impression, yet they need some support."

She developed a line of pantyhose based on this patent, under the name "Nudemar". I found one reference online that said this line was popular in the 70's and 80's. No doubt the picture in People boosted the sales along with many a tush.

We also learn from this patent that "Breasts of young women tend to be protuberant whereas breasts of older women tend to be pendulous. Protuberant breasts are supported by fibrous tissue strands known asligaments of Astley Cooper." This brassiere patent also teaches that Howard Hughes developed bras.

As I was relating this information to my wife, a third Julie Newmar memory surfaced in my addled brain. This memory is, oddly enough, also related to patents.

The US Patent and Trademark Office has a page where one can search for patents by looking for inventors, keywords, or the like. Search queries are facilitated through the use of a simple language. To look for my patents, for example, you might type in something like "in/john and in/seymour and is/wi". This means that the IN (inventor name) field of the patent must contain the words "John" and "Seymour", and that the IS (inventor state) must be WI.

Naturally, they need to provide some examples for how to construct queries. One of their examples is "in/newmar-julie". When I first saw this, I just thought it was a cute joke that someone threw in. Little did I know, since I never actually tried typing this example in.

Incidentally, if you key in their example, you will only bring up two of Newmar's patents. The first of her patents is too old to show up in their online database. No patents before 1976 are at this site.

If you will excuse me, I am going to see if I can find some old episodes of Batman.

karaoke in Ann Arbor

2011-04-01T12:47:00.000-05:00

I have just read an article about a karaoke DJ in Ann Arbor Michigan. There is evidently not much different between Milwaukee and Ann Arbor. Here are some quotes from Mark Carlson that I stole from the article.

"If a guy comes up and puts in for a Billy Joel song, he's a karaoke ringer and an unimaginative one."

Hmmm... I'm not sure about this one, Mark. Piano Man is not one of my favorites. It is repetitious with numerous verses that all sound alike and they keep coming repetitiously in a way that seems to repeat again and again before lapsing into yet another repeat of the same melody on the next verse, although you can switch octaves from one verse to another, they kind of all sound the same the way they go over the same notes and chords and kinda the same lyrics, but not the exactly the same although...

But I repeat myself. For five minutes and 46 seconds.

I did hear one great version of it, though. It was sung by three guys who kept the energy going by alternating lines. I was one of the three guys, by the way. I am sure it sounded great from the audience, too.

"If there are more than three people on stage, the performance is going to be awful."

Mark, I think this is almost always true. Except for this one time where three guys got up to sing Piano Man. They were totally awesome. Did I mention that I was one of them?

"I hate taking bribes, even though I could use the money!"

Another of my pet peeves. Like when a guy rushes up to the stage to hand me a slip for Piano Man. There are 417 people ahead of him. He says, "Hey, can I sing next?" I tell him there are 417 people ahead of him. He slaps down two wadded up one dollar bills and says, "My girlfriend wants to hear me sing. She it H-O-T-T hot, and I am gonna get lucky if I sing this for her!" He winks, and I consider this. Is it worth two bucks? I'll piss off 417 people whose idea of fair does not include someone skipping to the front of the line. If Jim Morrison and Janis Joplin came back from the dead, along with Jimmy Hendrix on guitar, they would want him at #418.

"If somebody comes up and says they're going to be great, that's a guarantee they're going to suck. Every time. But that's okay! The whole point of karaoke is that anyone can do it. You say you're going to be awesome? I really don't care. It's karaoke!"

Amen Brother! This must be a universal experience for KJs! I have never heard someone with an awesome voice tell me ahead of time that they will rock. Never.

When I get someone tell me they are great, it's usually instead of giving me a bribe. "My girlfriend wants to hear me sing. She is h-o-t-t hot. You won't regret letting me sing. People will love it!"

I'm sorry, dude. You're missing the point of karaoke. There are 417 people who came here so that they can get on stage. If they wanted to go to a concert, they would have gone to the Morrison / Joplin / Hendrix concert next door. I understand Ray Charles will be on keyboard.

"People rarely buy me drinks. They just don't think of it, I guess."

Yeah, same here in Milwaukee. Every once in a while, I get an older guy offering me a drink. Or a younger guy will just hand me a shot without asking. But, I make it a point to not drink when I am KJing. Just me. Professional. And by the way, almost every bar I have worked at offers free drinks to the entertainment.

Someone keeps a long list. It's a list of songs that you should never sing at karaoke. They're musical atrocities or uncreative lay-ups. "Don't Stop Believin'." "Sweet Caroline." "Livin' on a Prayer." "Bohemian Rhapsody."

That someone is me! Here's the list. I surveyed 19 websites that had lists of bad karaoke to compile my list. Here are the rankings for the four songs:
      Don't Stop Believin' is #15.
      Sweet Caroline is #19.
      Livin' on a Prayer is way down at #116
      Bohemian Rhapsody is #14.

Three songs I never want to hear again: 'Piano Man'. 'Wannabe'. 'Baby Got Back'.

Piano Man is #37, and Baby Got Back makes a good showing at #13. Wannabe is just a wannabe. Surprisingly, it did not make it on my list of 184 songs.

I don't want to come off as an expert or anything here. All I have is 32 hours of laborious scientific research behind my list. But Mark, you might want to start hating Paradise by the Dashboard Light. I'm just saying.

The article ends with a fabulous quote that, as far as I'm concerned, sums up the whole meaning of karaoke:

"The best karaoke singers are the ones who get up there and do it like they mean it. They have fun with it, and everybody in the bar has more fun because of that. I don't care what your voice sounds like, just let us hear you!"

Thank you, Mark!

Karaoke and alcohol

2011-03-29T17:13:00.000-05:00

If you are in Sydney, Australia, be forewarned that alcohol and karaoke don't mix. I quote Superintendent Mark Walton of the NSW Police Force

... it's clear some premises [karaoke bars] are still conducting activities which encourage patron intoxication and that's of great concern to police,

Imagine... a karaoke bar that encouraged people to drink. Unbelievable.

In Japan, the situation is a bit different.

Speaking of Venn diagrams, math teachers also seem to get the relationship between karaoke and alcohol.
A group of 70 math teachers spent nearly $2,000 in federal funds on alcohol at one dinner while on a KIPP retreat in New York City in January 2005, the audit states. And at two separate retreats for school leaders in Cancun, Mexico, KIPP charged the federal government more than $7,000 for alcohol and more than $2,500 for DJs, karaoke services, and basketball equipment, according to the audit, which was first reported in Education Week.

If you would prefer your karaoke without the alcohol, may I recommend the Drunk Karaoke machine, which simulates the drunken experience.

Question about home karaoke

2011-03-26T10:09:00.001-05:00

Question:

Hello there!

I hope you don't mind that I am emailing you out of the blue, but I found your blog when I was trying to figure out if my dvd player would show lyrics from a karaoke cd. I am not very technically knowledgeable but from what I've read it seems that this is not possible. I was wondering if there was a machine specifically made for just playing karaoke cds, but not for microphones, etc... a karaoke dvd player if you will. My boyfriend has a number of speakers and microphones from a former music career and we are starting karaoke nights with some of his friends. We have microphones and numerous speakers so we don't need that, I just need something to show the lyrics on the tv screen. I read somewhere in your blog that they make ipod adaptions. Would this allow me to download karaoke music onto my ipod and then use this to take the lyrics and music from my ipod to the tv and stereo system? Again, I apologize for my lack of technological knowledge.

Thank you for your time!

Sarah

Answer:

Hi Sarah,

No problem at all. I get these questions periodically.

First question: Can you do it with a DVD player? When I bought my first karaoke CD, I plugged it into my DVD player, and it actually worked. :) It played the music and the words showed up on my TV. Because it worked, I bought another CD and another and another. All of a sudden, I was a karaoke DJ. A modern day success story.

I got another DVD player and it did not play karaoke. :( There was no indication when I bought either one as to whether it would play karaoke. So... try the karaoke CDs with whatever DVD player you can find. Maybe you'll get lucky?

Second question: Can you run karaoke on your iPod. I currently have several hundred of the songs that I do on my iPod. All I need is a powered speaker and the iPod and I can sing for my supper. Your iPod can also drive a TV set, BTW. I don't know if you found my post on that, but it's a cheap cable and a setting on the iPod. (To read more, look at the tail end of this post.)

The movie files are not all that much bigger than anmp3 file. I just checked... I looked at 89 files that I had converted. The total disk space is 775 MB, or roughly 9 MB per song. If your iPhone has 8 GB, then it might hold close to 1,000 songs? If you have a 160 Gb iPod, then can fit about half a zillion songs.

But... it's gonna take some work to move them from a karaoke CD to the iPod. First, you need to rip them from the CD to files. Each track will have a .mp3 file, just like those that we know and love, and also a .cdg file which has the lyrics. Second, you need to combine the music (.mp3) and the lyrics (,cdg) into a video file. Normally this would be a mp4 file, since this is a format supported by the iPod. (If you donwload a movie through iTunes store, it is stored in mp4 format.) Then you just load them to the iPod with iTunes or some other program.

Ripping... You can't use the normal ripping programs like iTunes or Winamp, since they don't support the lyrics part. I use a program called Siglos Power CD+G burner. There may be a free add-on to WinAmp, but I haven't tried it.

Combining into mp4 file... I use another program from Siglos called Power CD+G to iPod Converter.

Another option... if you haven't already invested in a big pile of karaoke CDs... is to buy the karaoke songs in the iPod (mp4) format. Karaoke.com has a number of songs available in this format. When I last looked, the selection wasn't huge. That may have changed. I don't know if anyone else sells karaoke songs in mp4 format.

I think this might be enough to get you there? Feel free to ask more questions.
John

Karaoke Terror - the movie

2011-02-12T06:00:00.000-06:00

Just to let you know, there is another movie about karaoke out. It's called Karaoke Terror. I'm not planning on seeing it.

Here is a review:
http://deadlydollshouse.blogspot.com/2011/01/sing-us-song-youre-karaoke-man.html

Subway karaoke contest

2011-02-10T06:00:00.000-06:00

I debated about whether to write a post about Subway's karaoke contest. My first thought was that the contest is purely and obviously commercial. I mean... you have to sing their lyrics about about their new sandwich to "Sweet Home Alabama". Ok, I love that song, so I poked further.

The first prize is £1000 (€1,500 in ROI in Ireland). I'm not even sure what that means. Pounds (I think) and euros, but ROI? I dunno. I could look it up, but the contests is only open to residents of England or Ireland. Ok... I know some folks in Ireland.. I am related to some folks in England. Like King Henry VIII. Not a close relative, mind you. Through marriage.

Is it worth writing a post, though, that only applies to the 14 British and one Irish viewer I had in the past month?

Then I saw the video. Yes, this is worth posting. Good luck to you, unnamed Tubway goddess! I love your mic.

More karaoke quotes

2011-02-08T18:00:00.000-06:00

Here are a few karaoke quotes from the web that I either found insightful, or incite-ful.

"Karaoke symbolizes a freedom that hardly any other actions in the field of entertainment can offer. It delivers persons the courage to come up in front of an unknown audience to sing songs even inside the face of potential shame."

http://articlesbase.cz.cc/refreshing-music-songs-information/

"The video below is a shining example of why karaoke should be made illegal, and why people taking part should be shot"

http://markjdaniels.wordpress.com/2011/01/20/karaoke-anybody-got-any-ear-plugs/

"I love the art of karaoke. Few activities are possibly better done drunk than grabbing a microphone in front of your friends and emoting your musical guts out as a computer generated rainbow and blank-faced extras project on a screen behind you. "

http://deadlydollshouse.blogspot.com/2011/01/sing-us-song-youre-karaoke-man.html

"Karaoke is like watching an Ashton Kutcher film—you need to knock a couple back to even consider it."

http://hermosabeach.patch.com/articles/two-times-the-charm

Update on Kate Moss' karaoke addiction

2011-02-06T06:00:00.000-06:00

I reported earlier this year about Kate Moss' addiction to karaoke. Sorry to say, it gets deeper. Her new mansion, at 7.5 million pounds, will have a stage and karaoke machines. Rumors that I will become her live-in karaoke host have been greatly exaggerated.

Near miss on getting discovered

2011-02-04T13:40:00.000-06:00

Ok... this is a near miss. According to the Sacramento Bee, James Garner was discovered doing karaoke. Yes, James Garner was discovered singing karaoke. He wasn't quite discovered by a talent scout. It was a drummer. But unfortunately, it is not the James Garner you might be thinking of. Not the James Garner of Maverick and Rockford Files. This is James Garner, the Elvis impersonator. I guess he's pretty good though.

Ashley Sullivan is another near miss. She got her start doing karaoke at Applebee's in her home town Springfield, MA, where she won first prize of $500. From there, she went on to American Idol, where she begged and pleaded her way out of a thumbs down.

Getting discovered the karaoke way? Ehhh... not quite.

Celebrity karaoke - Fred Schneider of the B-52s

2011-02-02T06:00:00.000-06:00

Love Shack showed up in the number one position of karaoke duets in my meta-analysis. It's no surprise that Fred Schneider has created a stir when he sings it in karaoke. In a recent interview, Schneider said that he got tired of all the people taking pictures with their cell phones. He still goes out for karaoke, but now he dresses in cognito, and sings lousy.

Whatever it takes, Fred. Somehow I manage to avoid getting my picture taken just by dressing normal and singing well.

"Bunga bunga" or karaoke?

2011-02-01T06:00:00.000-06:00

Italian prime minister Silvio Berlusconi has been under fire for allegation of some pretty wild parties involving numerous nubile beauties. The term "bunga bunga" has been invented to describe a party game involving the prime minister, numerous nubile and nude women, and a swimming pool.

Berlusconi's lawyers have conducted interviews of 29 people involved. It turns out these wild parties involving numerous nubile nude nymphs were actually just karaoke performances, and the people ate fruit. At least that's what Aidia Yespica has said.

Boy did that get blown out of proportion! I am sure the wire tap evidence that the prosecutors have provided will show that this is all just a big misunderstanding.

Karaoke in San Luis Obispo

2011-01-31T06:00:00.002-06:00

Last week, I had the great pleasure of speaking at a conference at Cal Poly in San Luis Obispo. I spoke on Jan 26th. I did not get into town until Jan 24th.

I make a big deal of the timing just to make sure there are no untoward allegations. It seems that at 11:03 AM on Jan 20th, police were summoned to a park bench on Higuera in San Luis Obispo, where "An elderly man with a straw hat was sitting on a bench in front of H&G Clothing, singing karaoke."
http://www.sanluisobispo.com/2011/01/28/1462305/whats-your-emergency.html

This was not me. Honest. I don't own a straw hat.

Ryan Cabrera karaoke scandal

2011-01-30T20:15:00.000-06:00

I submit my nomination for the single worst sentence in journalism for the year 2011. I know it's still early in the year, but this one is deserving of some recognition:

Ryan Cabrera and two women who sued the 28-year-old pop star, alleging they were seriously hurt after falling on the driveway of his home, have agreed to have the case decided by an arbitrator.

http://www.dailybreeze.com/news/ci_17194733

Cabrera was at a Burbank karaoke club in November of 2008. He was given a ride home by two ladies. They had a few drinks. On their way out at 3:30 AM, they slipped in his driveway, which they claimed was steep and poorly lit, and slippery. Both were injured. One woman claims to have been in a coma for weeks following the incident.

A lawsuit was filed in June of 2009, and the parties have just agreed to take this into arbitration.

I just don't know what to think of this. They went to karaoke with Ryan Cabrera?!?!!?

Celebrity karaoke - Fantasia

2011-01-27T06:00:00.000-06:00

In 2004, Fantasia Barrino won American Idol. Since that time, she has appeard in a Broadway version of The Color Purple, she has written an autobiography, and she had her own VH1 reality show. As of September 2010, she can add "I have sung karaoke" to her list of accomplishments.

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/09/05/fashion/05With.html

Celebrity karaoke - Bill Murray

2011-01-25T06:00:00.002-06:00

I think we all remember Bill Murray's portrayal of Nick the Lounge Singer on SNL. Just in case you have forgotten his smoothly polished lounge act, have a look.

Avid followers of my blogs may remember that Bill Murray is no stranger to karaoke. (See "Karaoke Goes to Hollywood" for a complete list of movies with karaoke scenes.) There was a karaoke scene in the movie "Lost in Translation" where he performed the song "More Than This".

It should come as no surprise that Bill Murray is a karaoke singer. It was a bit of a surprise, however, for a small group of people singing in a karaoke booth in NYC just recently. They got a knock on the door from someone who wanted to join them. They reluctantly let the guy in, but did not notice who he was. Fifteen minutes later, there was a knock on the door. They were told that the guy partying down with them was none other than Bill Murray.

More of the ongoing DSB-omania

2011-01-23T06:00:00.000-06:00

I found this excellent version of Don't Stop Believin' as performed by Elton John , Lady Gaga, Sting, Blondie, and Shirley Bassey. Enjoy!

Celebrity karaoke - Kelsey Grammer

2011-01-21T06:00:00.000-06:00

I loved him on Cheers. I loved him on Frasier. He played the same character in the two series - an overly-intellectual psychiatrist with just enough of his own neuroses to keep the show going. I suppose that says something about me, that I can relate to an overly-intellectual, slightly neurotic psychiatrist?

Kelsey Grammer recently made the tabloid news for allegedly partaking in not one, but two, acts of such moral depravity that they were shunned by the more mainstream media.

The first (and more socially acceptable) of the alleged acts of depravity was the insinuation of his ex-wife that he enjoys a little cross-dressing. They are going through a divorce and she was appearing on the Howard Stern show, so you know that this is very reputable gossip.

But, that's all not that bad. Quite a number of accomplished actors have donned female clothes for various roles. Robin Williams, Tony Curtis, Dustin Hoffman, and Joel Grey immediately come to mind. I don't recall if George W ever appeared in such a role. Maybe not.

The second act of depravity perhaps fits better with the slightly neurotic Dr. Frasier Crane, or even better with the character of Sideshow Bob on the Simpsons. Yes, you guessed it. Kelsey Grammer was caught singing karaoke. In public. And not just any song, but James Taylor's "Don't Let Me Be Lonely". You can judge for yourself, but I think he did pretty well. As for how well he pulls off the cross-dressing, I'm gonna wait until I see pictures to say how well he does.

Yet another update on getting discovered through karaoke

2011-01-19T10:37:00.000-06:00

Today I came across another near miss on my ongoing quest to find a star who got discovered as a result of singing in a karaoke bar. Well... it's not even really a near miss, but it is a sweet story.

Meghan Linsey was a karaoke host in a Nashville bar where she met Joshua Scott Jones. They started dating and formed a duo called Steel Magnolias. They entered a talent show called Can You Duet, which is a country music's answer to American Idol. They won the second season.

As I said, this isn't a story of them getting discovered in a karaoke bar. They discovered each other. There was no wildly excited talent scout in the audience who handed them a business card, saying "call me in the morning".

I suppose that someone could argue that Can You Duet is really just a karaoke competition on steroids. I have heard that comment made repeatedly against American Idol. It is usually intended as a disparaging remark. "This is not important culture. The contestants have no real talent. It's just glorified karaoke." American Idol is a very popular show. And the winners and also-rans go on to get recording contracts. And what's so bad about glorified karaoke anyway?

Linsey and Jones did get a recording contract with Big Machine Records, so they did make it to the big time. They just weren't discovered through karaoke. Maybe this story fits better in the category of karaoke romances.

Want to know more about them?
Here's what Wikipedia has to say about Steel Magnolias.
Here is a review of the duo.

Conan O'Brien on Japanese karaoke

2011-01-17T19:00:00.001-06:00

CONAN O’BRIEN

According to new reports, Facebook is not popular in Japan because Japanese people are traditionally introverted and private. The report was written by someone who has never set foot in a karaoke bar.

Laugh lines, NYTimes

Getting discovered through karaoke - Taylor Swift?

2011-01-15T06:00:00.000-06:00

Was Taylor Swift discovered while singing karaoke? As my readers no doubt know, finding a singing who got discovered through karaoke has pretty much been a full time occupation for me since my first post on the topic almost a year ago. My most recent blog on the subject was Dec 23.

I came across a claim that Swift made it to the big time by getting discovered singing karaoke. Here is a quote from the article:

Taylor has taken the country world by storm, in a career that could have been made into movie magic itself, the Cinderella story of a girl who was discovered while singing Karaoke in a small-town restaurant.

This isn't exactly my definition of getting discovered, but I think it's close enough. The definition I have given involves a karaoke bar. If Taylor Swift was truly discovered by singing karaoke in a restaurant, I am willing to say that I have finally found a singer who made it big through karaoke.

I had a look at the Taylor Swift official website to verify this. There is a "My Life" page, but Swift does not go into how she got discovered. Next stop, Wikipedia:

At age 11, Swift made her first trip to Nashville, hoping to obtain a record deal by distributing a demo tape of her singing with karaoke songs. She gave a copy to every label in town, but was rejected. After Swift returned to Pennsylvania, she was asked to sing at the U.S. Open tennis tournament, where her rendition of the national anthem received much attention.

From this, it would appear that Swift didn't make it big with the karaoke tapes, and that she didn't make it big until she found her way to the US Open. Lemme state this: peddling karaoke tapes to record companies does not qualify for my definition of getting discovered through karaoke. (Mary J. Blige was another artist discovered after peddling karaoke demos.)

A report from CBS News from May of 2008 had this to say about the discovery of Swift:

The 18-year-old Pennsylvania native, who grew up on a Christmas tree farm, started singing at the age of 10 at karoke contests, fairs and festivals in her hometown of Reading. With the support of her family, she headed to Nashville at age 11 to pursue her dream. By age 12, she was already writing songs with local songwriters in Nashville. Back in Pennsylvania, she landed an important gig singing the National Anthem at the U.S. Open tennis tournament, which got a lot of buzz.

This article says that Swift did the karaoke contest thing before she did the karaoke tape peddling thing. From this article, it would appear that she didn't get discovered until her post-karaoke contest days. (BTW I don't consider karaoke contests to fit my definition, either.)

The original article mentioned that Taylor was singing in a restaurant. Where did the restaurant thing come in?
I quote again from the CBS article:

After performing at Nashville's premier songwriters' café, The Bluebird Café, she was noticed by Scott Borchetta, who signed her onto Big Machine Records.

Cafe? Oh! Maybe that's the restaurant? The Wikipedia article on the Bluebird Cafe says that it is a nightclub, and it does not contain the word karaoke.

Based on this research, I am going to say that this rumor is false. I still have not found any credible evidence of a singer who made it big by being discovered singing in a karaoke bar.

Wisdom learned in a karaoke bar

2011-01-13T06:00:00.016-06:00

Ok, so this guy, Alexis, went to the Consumer Electronics Show in Vegas. No. Seriously. True story.

And of course, he went to sing karaoke. Cuz, like, what else does someone do when they are in Vegas? You know? I mean, how many hours can you stand dazed in front of a one armed bandit? Especially after standing dazed in 1.6 million square foot of the absolute latest and greatest in consumer technology?

Yup. I would have been in the karaoke bar, too. Gambling just doesn't excite me. Save a bar stool for me, Alexis!

A singer named George told the crowd that he was missing his wife. Then he did a great rendition of "My Girl". Naturally, Alexis (Remember him? The reporter who went to CES?) had a little chat with George after he sang. Alexis asked him for his secret to a happy marriage.

George told the following story to Alexis:
I've been coming to CES for so long, and all the guys would always want to go to strip clubs. So, I was on my phone at a strip club and there is this girl in front of me on a pole and she's dancing. She says, "You don't like what you see? Put the phone down." Then she says, "Who you talking to?" I say, "My wife." And she goes, "Get the hell out of here." I gave her the phone, and I said, "I'm here for [my coworkers] not for this."

My own secret to a happy marriage has been to sing with my wife every day. Maybe I should take George's advice, though. If I were to go to a strip joint and let my wife know that I was thinking abut her... What more proof of my love could a woman want?

My favorite posts from 2010

2011-01-11T06:00:00.000-06:00

The Best and the Worst
Jan 9, 2010, Top slow dance songs of all time
Jan 15, 2010, What is the worst karaoke song?
Mar 13, 2010, What is the longest karaoke song?
May 25, 2010, What should I sing?
Oct 26, 2010, Best songs of the 80's
Dec 8, 2010, The most maligned karaoke song

Getting discovered series
Jan 26, 2010, Getting discovered through karaoke
Jan 31, 2010, Update on getting discovered
Sep 18, 2010, Air guitars and the best karaoke in Milwaukee
Dec 19, 2010, Is this getting discovered?
Dec 23, 2010, Yet another update on "getting discovered through karaoke"

Karaoke in the movies
Mar 7, 2010, Karaoke goes to Hollywood
May 20, 2010, More on karaoke goes to Hollywood

So you wanna be a karaoke host series
Mar 19, 2010, How can a KJ help bad singers?
Mar 23, 2010, Part 1, Generic karaoke system
Mar 30, 2010, Part 2a, Examples of all-in-one systems
Mar 30, 2010, Part 2b, Working dog category
Mar 30, 2010, Part 3, File formats for karaoke files
Apr 4, 2010, Part 4, Microohony
Apr 6, 3020, Part 5, Mixing it up
Apr 28, 2010, Running Dual dound cards
Apr 27, 2010, Part 6, Karaoke system amp
May 5, 2010, Part 7, Getting those karaoke vibrations going
May 5, 2010, Part 8, Watts and RMS and Ohms, oh my
Jul 10, 2010, Where can I download karaoke songs?
Aug 8, 2010. My new powered speakers
Oct 6, 2010, Rant on piracy

Jewis Christmas songs
Dec 30, 2009, Jewish Christmas Songs
Apr 9, 2010, Jewish Chjristmas Somgs, Update
Dec 12, 2010, Jewish Christmas songs, once more
Dec 25, 2010, The definitive list of Jewish Christmas songs

Downright silly
Apr, 2010, Was Marvin Gaye?
Apr, 2010, Flickr mot accepting downloads
Mar 7, 2010, Which came first, the doobie or the brothers?
May 19, 2010, Rock On!
Oct 15, 2010, Waiting for the call (Nobel prize in karaoke)
Oct 19, 2010, Heaven
Nov 3, 2010, OMG is that bad PR!
Nov 19, 2010, Half naked karaoke that I have missed
Nov 22, 2010, Odd places for karaoke
Dec 12, 2010, New strange places to sing karaoke

Music history
Apr 4, 2010, Which came first, the doobie or the brothers? How bands got their names
May 3, 2010, More origins of band names
Jul 16, 2010, How a song about a woman became a state song
Sep 26, 2010, Where did AC/DC get their name?
Oct 25, 2010, Heavy metal, horror flicks, and Jewish music

Sociology of karaoke
Aug 21, 2010, Is karaoke a performance or a sing-a-long?
Oct 12, 2010, Bad karaoke dates, and one good one
Nov 24, 2010, Finally some real research on karaoke!
Dec 22, 2010, Stories of losing your karaoke virginity

Celebrity karaoke
Jun 17, 2010, Kelly Clarkson sings karaoke
Jul 14, 2010, Undercover karaoke (with Jewel)
Sep 28, 2010, Gloria Estefan? Sings country??!?!?!?
Oct 2, 2010, Quote from Davy Jones
Oct 9, 2010, Jennifer Aniston is a karaoke -phile
Oct 30, 2010, Claudia Schiffer "admits" to singing karaoke
Nov 8, 2010, Gwenyth Paltrow on Glee!
Nov 15, 2010, Celebrity karaoke - Gerard Butler
Dec 16, 2010, Celebrity karaoke - Paul Rudd
Dec 27, 2010, OMG!!! Miley Cyrus sings karaoke!

More on "Cat's Meow"

2011-01-09T06:00:00.001-06:00

Faithful readers of this blog will recall that I have done a bit of mocking of the "karaokecam" that is located at Cat's Meow in New Orleans. It started with this post, where I let my adoring fans know that the webcam was not working.

When I ran into a site that listed KaraokeCam as one of the best 25 webcams in the world, I naturally had to post a followup.

I had the pleasure to visit New Orleans in March of 2009. I went down there with high expectations, since I had wanted to visit there for a long time. I was fully expecting that I would be disappointed, not so much because of Katrina, but just because I was expecting so much.

I was not disappointed in the least. New Orleans was fabulous. The cuisine, the 24-7 party atmosphere, the friendliness of everyone, the music, the music, the music, and yes, the music!

I also stopped in to sing karaoke at two places. Sorry to say, that was a tiny bit of a let down. Each place had a song "book" that was a single sheet of paper, printed on front and back. Neither place had more then a few hundred songs in the library. That blew me away. I don't think a KJ could survive in Milwaukee with less than a few thousand songs. But it was ok, really. I didn't visit New Orleans to sing karaoke. And maybe that's why they don't need more than a small collection of songs.

I ran into an article that has me confused again. The article talks about the top five nightclubs in New Orleans. The Cat's Meow is on that short list. To my surprise, the article had this to say:

it was one of the first clubs in the US that had karaoke, and fanatics say that it is one of the best (if not the best) karaoke club in the whole world.

Wow. I am not sure that the Cat's Meow was one of the places that I sang at. I was there for a week. I was looking for karaoke. I think I would have found it. If it was one of the places that I sang, then I really don't understand the fanatics would say this is the bests karaoke spot in the world. If didn't sing at the Cat's Meow, then I guess I really missed something big. Yet another reason for me to take another trip to New Orleans!

More celebrity karaoke - Amy Adams

2011-01-07T06:00:00.001-06:00

Amy Adams was recently on Late Night With Jimmy Fallon, singing karaoke with Jimmy Fallon. She was plugging her new movie The Fighter, and showing off how svelte she looks after giving birth. I couldn't find an online clip of this karaoke experience, but I came across this video on Hulu from last January of the very pregnant Amy Adams and the not pregnant Jimmy Fallon.

The karaoke is pretty good. Amy Adams was of course Princess Giselle in Enchanted, so she is expected to know how to sing. Jimmy Fallon does pretty well, too, hitting the high notes on Livin' on a Prayer and bringing in a not so bad Neil Diamond in a duet of You Don't Bring me Flowers.

Icelandic karaoke marathon

2011-01-06T06:00:00.001-06:00

I apologize for the late notice on this post. I only became aware of this recently.

For those readers who are lucky enough either to be near Reykjavík or to have access to a personal jet, the good news is that Björk has scheduled a three-day karaoke marathon! The event is scheduled to start on Threttándinn (Jan 6), which is the last day of the Icelandic Christmas.

The purpose of this event is to increase awareness of the need to protect Iceland's natural resources. Hmmm... maybe I won't fly my personal jet in for this.

http://www.icelandreview.com/icelandreview/daily_news/?cat_id=21123&ew_0_a_id=372160
http://grapevine.is/News/ReadArticle/Bjork-And-Omar-Ragnarsson-To-Sing-Duet

Karaoke is more popular than mud wrestling and cosmetic surgery!

2011-01-05T06:00:00.009-06:00

Google has a new app with the catchy title "Google Ngram Viewer". I was so excited, I couldn't wait to use it.

What does this mean?

At my behest, those nice folks at Google searched every novel written in English between 1980 and 2008. I tried to get them to extend this to 2010, but they stopped at 2008. I thought about going back and asking again just a bit more loudly to make sure they understood my request. I decided not to worry about it, though, since they were so nice to me. I figgered that it would be good enough just to complain about it passive aggressively in a blog.

They counted the occurrences of a number of phrases of my choosing. I decided to look up a few popular Saturday night activities: karaoke (in blue), mud wrestling (in red), and cosmetic surgery (in green). As can be seen in the chart, karaoke overtook mud wrestling in about 1988. Yet another wonderful that happened in the 80's. It was about 2000 that karaoke took over from cosmetic surgery as the preferred was to spend a relaxing evening.

In English fiction books written in around 2007, the word "karaoke" appears 0.00007% of the time. That means that you can expect to run across the word karaoke about once 1.4 million words. To put this in perspective, the typical novel is about 100,000 words. If you read novels from 2008, you would likely run across the word "karaoke" every 14 books.

In my own novel reading, I see the word karaoke about five times a day. From that, you could conclude that I read about 70 novels a day. It doesn't leave a whole lot of time for blogging.

While I was at it, I figgered I might just as well contrast the popularity of two very popular public figures. Since I had been thinking about mud wrestling and cosmetic surgery, I naturally though of Sarah Palin. Since I am always thinking about me, I thought we should have a face off. Sarah Palin is in blue and John the Revelator is in red. As can be seen, there is no contest.

Kate Moss - karaoke addiction?

2011-01-03T06:00:00.001-06:00

According to the Telegraph fashion section, supermodel Kate Moss recently did a little karaoke. In the picture below we see her charming a lady with a Campbell's soup can on her head. Is Kate Moss a karaoke addict?

This is, of course, the fashion section, so we don't know whether to take it seriously. I mean, fashionistas don't take me seriously. Why should I believe someone with a soup can on her head? (Eye makeup by Crayola.) Rather than take the Telegraph fashion section as the final voice on whether Kate Moss is a karaoke addict, I decided to do a little research on my own. I provide the facts. The reader can decide whether this is a true addiction.

In March of 2009, Marie Claire reported that Kate is a karaoke queen. Marie Claire is an authority on celebrity gossip, so now the story is getting a bit more credible. In July of 2009, Kate sang Billie Jean for the most despised karaoke host who is not really a karaoke host. Yes, none other than Simon Crowell. That's pretty hardcore, Kate. With Simon?!?!? Doing a little K with Simon?

There's more to the story. Kate Moss threw a karaoke party for her daughter's birthday in Oct of 2009. Possibly this is an attempt to legitimize your addiction? By getting an innocent seven year old involved??!?!

In March of 2010, Kate started seeking positive outlets for her addiction, excuse me. Alleged addiction. Here we see a picture of her at the Mummy Rocks charity event. Really? Did she invent this charity to feed addiction.

In June of 2010, she brought in $77,000 in donations by singing my favorite Dont' Stop Believin' at a fundraiser for the Hoping Foundation. Yes, that is David Gilmour on guitar. And yes, Kate is on the floor. Need I say more?

So, take that soup can off your head and decide for yourself about whether an intervention is necessary.

Siskel and Ebert

2011-01-01T15:45:00.000-06:00

I am sorry to have not posted this in time to make people's Christmas lists!

Pioneer has come out with a LaserDisk karaoke machine. Selling for the unbelievable price of $200, it will play eight inch karaoke LaserDisks. Microphones are extra.

Here is the Siskel and Ebert review of the technological miracle from 1989. Stay tuned for the end to hear these gentlemen team up to sing California Dreamin'

OMG!!! Miley Cyrus sings karaoke!

2010-12-27T19:00:00.000-06:00

So, you think you've been having a slow news day?

Every few days, this dedicated karaoke reporter goes out looking for late breaking karaoke news that is important for you, my valued readers. The big news in the karaoke world today is that Miley Cyrus celebrated Christmas with her family by singing karaoke. Here is just a sampling of the plethora of news reports:

http://www.aceshowbiz.com/news/view/00037564.html
http://www.celebridoodle.com/celebridoodle/2010/12/miley-cyrus-karaoke-christmas.html
http://gawker.com/5718890/miley-cyrus-celebrates-christmas-with-a-cant-be-tamed-karaoke-sister-act
http://www.femalefirst.co.uk/entertainment/Miley+Cyrus-88914.html
http://entertainment.newsplurk.com/2010/12/miley-cyrus-sings-karaoke-on-christmas.html
http://www.musicrooms.net/rock-and-pop/22641-miley-cyrus-entertains-family-with-karaoke-performance-on-christmas-day.html
http://www.ineedmyfix.com/2010/12/27/miley-cyrus-loves-her-karaoke-video/
http://www.wenn.com/all-news/cyrus-joins-sister-for-christmas-day-karaoke/
http://gossipblender.com/gossip/cyrus-joins-sister-for-christmas-day-karaoke/
http://anythingdisney.livejournal.com/
http://www.durianboy.com/2010/12/miley-cyrus-spends-christmas-karaoke-ing-with-the-family-in-nashville/
http://www.gossipweasel.com/miley-cyrus-had-karaoke-christmascelebuzz/
http://jackskin.com/2010/12/26/miley-cyrus-sings-karaoke-on-christmas-people-magazine/
http://www.gnepse.com/miley-cyrus-sings-karaoke-on-christmas/
http://entertainmentoday.us/miley-cyrus-sings-karaoke-on-christmas
http://www.turkyurdu.com/hollywood/miley-cyrus-sings-karaoke-on-christmas/
http://bradsbeard.com/miley-cyrus-christmas-karaoke-with-the-family/
http://businessmobilenews.com/?p=1354
http://abendjournal.com/2010/12/27/miley-cyrus-sings-karaoke-on-christmas/
http://www.eonline.com/uberblog/b217932_miley_cyrus_has_very_merry_bong-free.html
http://nsbnews.net/content/371777-miley-cyrus-sings-karaoke-christmas-people-magazine

Surprisingly, this topic beat out karaoke news stories about Simon Crowell, and also beat out stories about people getting killed in the Philippines for singing My Way. With my tongue firmly lodged in my cheek, I am so glad that I decided to have a look today, because it would have been a shame for my readers to have missed this!

The definitive list of Jewish Christmas songs

2010-12-25T14:25:00.001-06:00

I present the most complete list of Christmas songs written by Jews:

1. "The Christmas Song", Mel Torme
2. "The Christmas Waltz", Sammy Kahn and Jule Styne
3. "Getting Ready for Christmas Day", Paul Simon
4. "Holly Jolly Christmas", Johnny Marks
5. "I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day", Johnny Marks
6. "I'll Be Home for Christmas", Buck Ram
7. "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year", Edward Pola, and George Wyle
8. "Let it Snow, Let it Snow", Sammy Kahn and Jule Styne
9. "Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree", Johnny Mark
10. "Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer", Johnny Marks
11. "Run Rudolph Run", Johnny Marks
12. "Silver Bells", Livingston and Evans
13. "Sleigh Ride", Leroy Anderson and Mitchell Parish
14. "There's No Place Like Home for the Holidays", Bob Allen
15. "You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch", Dr. Seuss and Albert Hague
16. "We Need a Little Christmas", Jerry Herman
17. "White Christmas", Irving Berlin
18. "Winter Wonderland", Richard B. Smith and Felix Bernard

The song "O Holy Night" has been proposed as another song for this list, but I have seen a number of references that say that Adolphe Adam was not Jewish.

In my previous blog on this topic, a completely valid comment was made "songwriters need to write songs, and Christmas is a huge market waiting to be exploited." I think maybe a better question might be why John the Revelator is so obsessed with this topic!!!

Yet another update on "getting discovered through karaoke"

2010-12-23T06:00:00.001-06:00

As my faithful followers can attest, I am on a lifetime quest to find a famous performer who made it to the big time by being discovered singing at a karaoke bar. While I have personally heard quite a number of karaoke singers who deserve to be made rich and famous, I am still unaware of this actually happening.

Let me be clear. I am talking about someone getting up on stage at a karaoke bar where there just happens to be a talent scout. And the rest becomes history. I am not talking about someone going into a karaoke booth and recording a demo tape, like Mary J. Blige. I am not talking about someone who won a karaoke contest, like Coco Lee. And I am not talking about someone who was discovered through American Idol.

I recently posted the story of how Garrett Hedlund auditioned for the movie Country Strong by going to a karaoke bar. That's not what I am talking about.

Here is another example of what I am not talking about: Tony DeCarlo was discovered through a MySpace video. The group Boston was looking for a lead singer and they happened upon a MySpace video that Tony's daughter had posted. And the rest was history. Great story, tear jerking, even. But it's not what I am looking for.

Shana Goodman suggested another singer who might have been discovered at a karaoke joint. She posted on the LinkedIn group "Karaoke Business Matrix" that the new lead singer for Journey had been discovered that way. Initially, I passed her comment off as a confusion between Boston and Journey. Shana, I apologize! I should never have doubted you!!

I finally looked this up today. The position of lead singer for Journey has been replaced a few times. Their first lead singer was Steve Perry. He could not make one of their tours because of a hip injury that he got while hiking. Perry was replaced by Steve Augeri, who had been in a few bands before. Then Augeri developed a chronic throat infection and needed to be replaced.

Arnel Pineda was brought in as the next lead singer. He was discovered through a YouTube video of him singing Journey songs with his cover band, The Zoo.

YouTube. Not a karaoke bar. Once again, a near miss. I continue on my quest.

Stories of losing your karaoke virginity

2010-12-22T06:00:00.018-06:00

We all remember our first time. The nervousness, the anticipation, the excitement!

My first karaoke performance was in a bar in Appleton. I sang James Taylor's version of Steamroller Blues, and I totally rocked it. I mean none of those dulcet Sweet Bay James tones... I tore that song apart with my teeth and spat it out. A woman came up from the audience and stuffed a dollar bill in my jeans. (If you were there, you may remember it slightly different. You tell it your way. I'll tell it mine.)

I surfed the net to find other stories of the loss of karaoke virginity. I hope you enjoy!

First story
It was an aborted ski trip. He found himself at a little motel in a snowstorm. Since there was nothing to do, he headed for the bar, and got caught up in the camaraderie of karaoke and kamikazes.

Things started getting a little fuzzy by then, and the next thing I knew, I was up on stage with the mic in my hand, singing Folsom Prison Blues. I had never karaoked before, and I had always thought it was pretty lame. But there I was, in front of a dozen or so of my new best buds, singing my heart out. And I gotta say: I tore that shit up. I was the Man In Black, even if it was black Gore-Tex.

http://butterbeanandcobra.blogspot.com/2010/11/how-i-lost-my-karaoke-virginity-in.html

Second story
She describes herself as one who always listens to the other people torturing karaoke songs, wanting to sing but always leaving for home with her tail between her legs. A party with co-workers changed all that.

“But last Saturday, I did it. On Saturday, I lost my karaoke virginity!”
“Well, what was it like?”
“It hurt a little at first…but then it was smooth sailing.”

http://kenyonreview.org/blog/?p=10236

Third story
Here is another story of the loss of karaoke virginity that happened with coworkers and a party. To put her courageous feat in perspective, this is how she described watching her boyfriend sing:

"I would dig my nails into the palms of my hands and go through the motions of extreme anxiety, as if it was me on the stage. I would experience similar feelings if I saw others go on stage and bomb – feeling sympathetic stage fright."

She finally lost her karaoke virginity when she was out celebrating Christmas with co-workers.

"Someone suggested karaoke and I egged them on, morbidly curious about seeing my boss sing. Turns out, he’s another one of those closet karaoke enthusiasts who would probably, if given the chance, sing Backstreet Boys tunes in front of an audience. In the space of half an hour, I found myself in a booth, helping people to choose songs, watching my boss belt out Wham! and drinking whisky. Someone passed me the microphone, I sang Tainted Love. It’s done."

http://captio.wordpress.com/2010/12/18/karaoke-done/

A bunch of fourth stories
There are a number of interesting karaoke stories on the website below. I have taken a few excerpts:

"Hi, My name is Moe, and I am a Karaoke junkie. Come, sit closer, and hear the tale of how a good and innocent young girl was lured into the dark underbelly of the karaoke world, and how, after losing her karaoke virginity (at about 18) became the notorious Mistress M- Kamikaze Karaoke Junkie (a.k.a. Miss Kitty)."

"I decided to try Billy Joel's Uptown Girl. I massacred the song by singing a verse that didn't belong, and created further damage as my voice cracked while singing a line... My first karaoke bar experience occurred in Montreal in the summer of 1993, at a club that boasted the perfect mix of atmosphere, alcohol, and good singers. Ever since then, I've been a karaoke slut."

"All of a sudden, my love for karaoke turned into an outright addiction."

"It took me 6 weeks to decide that I had enough guts to hold a microphone and sing into it."

"I was "dragged" to a small café on Bloor Street in Toronto. That was it. I got the bug. I was hooked. Within months, all of my friends and my free time included karaoke."

http://www.dogandponysound.com/fun_stories.htm

Fifth story

"Details about the sing song, I really have no idea how to describe......... but the last 20 minutes was epic! Everyone of us stood up, I mean every single person in the room, and sang whatever song was playing. I don't know why, but I had a temporary voice conversion after that."

http://wseen.blogspot.com/2010/12/first-time-going-karaoke.html

Jewish Christmas songs, once more

2010-12-21T06:00:00.000-06:00

Since we are in the Christmas season, and since I am talking about two Jewish songwriters (Pomus and Shuman), I will revisit the question of Jewish Christmas songs. A year ago, I wrote a post about Christmas songs that were written by Jews. I found nine such songs.

In April, I posted an addendum with a tenth Jewish Christmas song.

Just recently, Mathew Semple made me aware that another Jew, a certain Paul Simon, has just released a Christmas song. This brings the tally up to eleven.

Update on KaraokeCam

2010-12-20T06:00:00.000-06:00

I reported earlier that the New Orleans KaraokeCam at Cats Meow was down. As far as this reporter knows, this is still the case. But that does not keep them from winning a prestigious award. EarthCam selected KaraokeCam as one of the 25 most interesting webcams.

The famous "Cat's Meow" has been catering to karaoke fans for over 20 years and you have a live bird's eye view of all the action. And this very cool webcam gives you the option to mouse over the screen when there is no live action and choose a time frame from the previous night so you can re-live some extreme karaoke moments.

I am excited that karaoke is receiving some long due recognition. Along with Rich da Barber Cam and Sea Monkey Cam.

Is this getting discovered?

2010-12-19T06:00:00.000-06:00

Country Strong will be opening in theaters Dec 22, 2010. The movie is about country singer songwriter played by Garrett Hedlund, and the comeback of a country singer, played by Gwenyth Paltrow.

Paltrow's connection with karaoke has been documented before in this blog. Hedlund also has a connection to karaoke. He auditioned in a karaoke bar.

I don't want anybody to get the wrong idea here. Hedlund was not discovered in a karaoke bar. Getting discovered through karaoke is a favorite topic of mine:
Getting discovered through karaoke
Update on getting discovered
Finally some real research on karaoke

Just in case you don't have time to read these fantastic blog posts, let me summarize. I still have not found a celebrity who was discovered because there was a talent scout at a karaoke bar who happened to hear them.

Hedlund came close to being the first recipient of the Discovered Through Karaoke Prize. Unfortunately, his performance was an official audition. The director, Shana Feste, didn't know whether Hedlund could sing. What better way to check this out, than at a karaoke bar?

Update on "the most maligned karaoke song"

2010-12-18T12:59:00.000-06:00

I had a previous post about a KJ who was charging for people to sing Don't Stop Believin. Evidently my post was not the only outcry. There was a follow up interview that explains why the KJ has taken such strong measures to combat one song in his collection.

Roger Niner explained in the interview that he got tired of hearing it, so he took it out of his songbook. Even then, people kept asking for it. Despite not having the song listed in his book, he had a night where numerous people asked for the song. In his words: "I just snapped. I'm not going to delete it, because that's just going to be a disaster. So I said, 'Alright, I'm going to make some money from this.'"

The interview ends with this comment from Niner: "... that song, I just -- I can't do it anymore. It just drove me to the point of insanity."

The song is among the most popular karaoke songs, if not the most popular. People want to sing it. These are the people who spend money on drinks and make it possible for a club to hire a KJ.

Just to balance this out, I quote from an excellent article about the song, written by Dorian Lyndsky of the Guardian:

It was a song inspired by failure. Journey started life as a jazz-rock band in San Francisco in 1973, but they were floundering and hitless when, four years later, they recruited singer Steve Perry, who was having little luck himself. Their fortunes drastically improved, but the sentiments of Don't Stop Believin' harked back to the lean years. Before keyboardist Jonathan Cain joined in 1980, he was also struggling while living on LA's Sunset Boulevard. Each time he called home in despair, his dad would tell him: "Don't stop believing or you're done, dude."

That's the kind of positive stuff I like to hear!

Celebrity karaoke - Paul Rudd

2010-12-16T06:00:00.001-06:00

Paul Rudd and Owen Wilson will be vying for the heart of Reese Witherspoon in How Do You Know, opening Dec 17, 2010. I found an interview of the Rudd and Wilson that gave a little foretaste. Paul Rudd will be singing some hysterical Teddy Pendergrass song to Witherspoon. And... this is a favorite number for him when he sings karaoke.

Nothing on the official website tells me what he is going to sing, so I guess I will just have to see the movie for myself.

Rudd is a big fan of karaoke. Here is a quote from Entertainment Weekly

"My big karaoke friends are Bobby Cannavale, [Role Models director] David Wain, Joe Lo Truglio [from I Love You, Man], Mather Zickel [the best man in Rachel Getting Married], and sometimes Peter Dinklage. We've all 'raoked together over the years. We rent rooms. It isn't like we're going to a bar. So it's like four guys sitting around singing. We'll often say, ''Tonight we're doing songs that we've never done before.'' We all want to impress the others with the song choices. A lot of it is lost '70s classics. It'll be great if somebody busts out a little ''Shannon'' by Henry Gross, or ''So Very Hard to Go'' by Tower of Power. I love ''The Worst That Could Happen'' by Johnny Maestro and the Brooklyn Bridge. We all love to sing, but none of us are singers."

And here is a YouTube video of Rudd singing More Than A Feeling.

"We all love to sing, but none of us are singers."

Al Jarreau

2010-12-15T06:00:00.001-06:00

I was surprised to hear this week that jazz singer Al Jarreau was born of a Seventh-Day Adventist minister and church pianist in Milwaukee. I suppose everyone else in Milwaukee knew that. I am a transplant, being born 117 miles and 7 realities away in Baraboo, so I am not up on all the famous people who are from Milwaukee.

In 1962, Jarreau was a psychology student at University of Iowa. Ben Marcus hired him to sing in his lounge. He was billed as the "Singing Psychologist".

Jarreau returned to Milwaukee in November to performed for the 75th anniversary of the Marcus Corporation. This is what he said about the performance: "At the end of the dinner and presentations, the band and I—you know the guys—did a 50 minute burn that I would describe as one of the most intense and delightful performances of my life. It was ‘the zone’ where time slows down to the point where you can reach out and move the pieces on the chessboard at will and in slow motion. Athletes talk about it all the time."
Read the full diary entry here

"where times slows down to the point where you can ... move the pieces on the chess board ... in slow motion"
Cool.

What karaoke songs does an opera diva sing?

2010-12-14T06:00:00.003-06:00

Do opera and karaoke go together? Maybe. Here are song karaoke favorites from opera singers.

Australian soprano Rachelle Durkin
" I was always in love with Whitney Houston and Maria Carey, so I like to sing like that every now and then."
http://www.mcv.gaynewsnetwork.com.au/features/marriage-the-mozart-way-008194.html

"I'm a classically trained singer, and while I don't generally do opera at karaoke bars, I do sing a lot of show tunes, standards, and pop songs that I have carefully picked out because I can sing them in my lower range and have them sound like pop songs."
BirdGirl
http://au.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20101105090024AAqT46w

Barbara Pasqa, a semi-pro opera singer from Uniontown PA entered a karaoke contest back in April of this year. Her songs? You Raise Me Up and I Could Have Danced All Night.
http://www.allbusiness.com/humanities-social-science/visual-performing-arts-theater/14263707-1.html

Carla Thensen Hanson, an American soprano, was asked if she sang opera:
"Only when drunk. The last time I went I was with my sisters and we were all quite intoxicated because it was for another sister’s wedding. We sang We Are Family. Naturally."
http://www.rochestermagazine.com/10/or/so/questions/with/carla/thelenhanson/opera/singer/story-714.html

Just in case you actually want to sing an aria next time you are out for karaoke, you can download your favorite track: http://www.opera-karaoke.com/index.html

Karaoke Man - the movie

2010-12-13T06:00:00.001-06:00

I am always excited when I hear of another movie that features karaoke. Even more excited when I hear of a movie that is about karaoke. And being a goofy romance? I can hardly contain myself!

Max, a comic book illustrator, is told that he should wear a superhero costume in order to have the courage to sing karaoke. Max asks if that is cheating. The answer? "Not if you get laid out of the deal!"

Karaoke Man. Coming to a theater near you. Maybe.

New strange places to sing karaoke

2010-12-12T06:00:00.002-06:00

I have had a few posts about odd places to sing karaoke. My last post on the subject was about the karaoke cabbie. Before that, I listed a few places in Texas, including the Houston airport.

I just found out that Houston airport will once again be providing karaoke for their travelers. Here is news coverage from last year's karaoke.

Another airport karaoke opportunity popped up just before I published this. According to StuckAtTheAirport.com (what a great URL name!) You can also sing karaoke at the Detroit Airport this holiday season.

More on karaoke for your health

2010-12-11T06:00:00.001-06:00

No doubt you have already read my blog on all the wonderful health benefits of karaoke. It would appear that fitness guru Billy Banks, Jr. read my blog as well! Have a look at Cardioke!

Sing karaoke with Lionel Richie!

2010-12-10T06:00:00.002-06:00

While I am in a Motown mood, I should mention that Lionel Richie will be going on tour in Australia and New Zealand in March of 2011. I caught an interview of him. Richie had this to say about his show:

"Just tell them it will be the best karaoke night you could go to. Because that's a fact. We are going to have a big ole' karaoke jam with lots of funk and lots of ballads and there'll be romance and laughs and some great music."

If you want to warm up your Motown karaoke before you head to the land down under, stop in at MJ Cafe and Martini Bar on Sunday nights. Revelator Karaoke will be serving up the best Motown karaoke in the area. Singing starts at 7:30.

MJ Cafe and Martini Bar
A relaxed eatery and martini bar
6901 W. Brown Deer Rd
Milwaukee
(414) 377-2524

Save the Last Dance

2010-12-09T06:00:00.040-06:00

I was in high school when I first heard the song Save the Last Dance for Me. I thought it was a dumb song. "But don't forget who's taking you home, and in whose arms your gonna be"? I mean really. It sounds like the guy is getting all possessive of the woman who took to a dance. But there is a whole lot more to the story.

The lyrics of Save the Last Dance for Me were written by Doc Pomus and Mort Shuman. Doc had polio at a young age and needed crutches just to walk. His wife Willi was a beautiful actress and dancer who loved the nightlife.

Not only couldn't he dance with his lovely wife, but he felt out of place with the Broadway crowd that she attracted. He had this to say:
"I had a house, a swimming pool, all that shit, and we had nothing but these Broadway characters hanging around. None of them paid any attention to me and if they asked what kind of songs I wrote I felt embarrassed. If I had written a fifth-rate Broadway song, my God, they would have been proud."

Willi and Doc were married in 1957.
"Save the Last Dance" was first recorded in 1960.
Willi divorced Doc in 1965.

All of a sudden the song has become rather poignant. Doc, I take back what I said about your song when I was a teenager.

References
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Save_the_Last_Dance_for_Me
http://www.elvis.com.au/presley/elvis_presley_doc_pomus_mort_shuman.shtml
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Doc_Pomus
http://www.felderpomus.com/docpomus1.html
http://launch.dir.groups.yahoo.com/group/billybeartrivia/message/141417?unwrap=1&var=1
http://wfmu.org/LCD/23/docpomus.html
http://www.nydailynews.com/archives/news/2005/06/30/2005-06-30_nobody_s_cripple__doc_pomus_.html

The most maligned karaoke song

2010-12-08T21:14:00.001-06:00

I saw something online that really shook me. There is a KJ in San Francisco who is charging folks $5 to sing Don't Stop Believin'!

To me, this is sacrilege. My loyal readers will remember a blog of mine ("What should I sing?") where I combined the lists of best karaoke songs from 41 websites. Don't Stop Believin' came out on top. Of the 41 "best of" lists, 14 of them included Don't Stop Believin'. The next song in line (Total Eclipse of the Heart) was mentioned only 11 times. DSB is clearly the winner. This is not my opinion. This is the consensus of the experts on the web!

I might add that Don't Stop Believin' did not make it on my list of worst karaoke songs. I searched for lists of worst karaoke songs, and combined the results from 19 websites.

I am sorry Mr. SF KJ. People like the song.

Karaoke therapy

2010-11-27T14:15:00.001-06:00

I stumbled across an article in the journal Alcoholism: Clinical and Experimental Research that piqued my interest. I remember years ago when the medical community was rocked with research that red wine is good for your heart. The first reaction of the medical community was to get legislation passed that prohibited anyone from ever implying that more than one glass of wine was good for you.

The next thing the medical community did was to go looking for the chemical in red wine that prevented heart attacks, provided one never ever drank more than one glass of wine. Resveratrol was one of the early suggestions. Later, they found that one would need to drink hundreds of bottles of wine a day for the resveratrol to have any effect. Since it is illegal to imply that more than one glass of wine might be good for you, this part of the research was quickly hushed up.

Right from the start, I knew that the search for a chemical component to wine that promoted health was ill conceived. Yes, there probably are some components of wine that are healthful, but (my opinion) the silly researchers were missing the forest for the trees. Alcohol relaxes you. And reducing stress will do all kinds of good chemical stuff in your body, and so, will promote good health. And further, the socializing we often do when we drink also helps relax us. The picture below relaxes me even without even having a sip of beer.

What about the ill effects of too much drink? Again, maybe stress is the operative force. Anyone who has had a hangover or been in a drunken bar fight will attest to the fact that too much alcohol can raise your stress level.

My thesis is that a large part of the health benefit from drinking (no more than one drink) is from relaxation and socialization. The article I found shows that the medical community has finally heard my message. The conclusion to the paper:

Conclusions: Social support may enhance the beneficial effect of light-to-moderate alcohol consumption on risk of cardiovascular disease.

But the paper really caught my attention when the subject of karaoke was brought up. Here is a comment from one person who commented on the article:

Tanigawa [the author] also recommended karaoke bars as one way for business persons to cope with stress.' Singers use deep breathing, which is good for the parasympathetic nervous system. After singing, they usually receive applause. It is a good kind of social support, and helps in the face of adverse occasions or stressful events.'

YES!!!! They finally get it!! Thank you Dr. Tanigawa.

Intrigued, I went on a search through Pubmed to find other research that said karaoke can promote good health. I found two research papers on the benefits of karaoke therapy.

Karaoke therapy in the rehabilitation of mental patients
CONCLUSION: Karaoke therapy may be more effective [for treating chronic schizophrenic patients] than simple singing in improving social interaction. There is preliminary evidence that it may be anxiety-provoking for unstable schizophrenic patients. More research is required for further elucidation of the characteristics of favourable candidates, optimal schedule and active components of the therapy.

Karaoke for quads: a new application of an old recreation with potential therapeutic benefits for people with disabilities
CONCLUSION: This article examines theoretical considerations and proposes a research agenda. Empirical research would be valuable to confirm the potential benefits of karaoke for people with disabilities.

But just like vino, there can be too much of a good thing. I found an article that warns of the dangers of too much karaoke.

Effect of hydration and vocal rest on the vocal fatigue in amateur karaoke singersThese results suggest that hydration and vocal rests are useful strategies to preserve voice function and quality during karaoke singing. This information is useful educational information for karaoke singers.

Just how valuable is karaoke?

2010-11-26T06:00:00.000-06:00

I read the following new story from Huntington, W. Virginia:

A 48-year-old Chesapeake area woman reported last week that someone entered her home in Union Township and stole jewelry and a karaoke machine. The items were valued at $2,350.
http://www.herald-dispatch.com/news/briefs/x784149180/Lawrence-blotter-Jewelry-karaoke-machine-stolen-in-home-break-in

I am imagining the thief wandering around the house. "Now where would they hide that karaoke machine. Gotta find it... Oh! Quick stuff some of this jewelry in my pocket. ... Now where is that karaoke machine!??!?!"

Please contact the police if you happen to live near Huntington and a guy in a trench coat tries to sell you a karaoke machine. And everyone else? Make sure you chain your karaoke machine down!

Motown karaoke at MJ Cafe on Brown Deer Rd

2010-11-25T06:00:00.003-06:00

Some interesting connections between John the Revelator and Motown ...

My second eight-track tape was The Temptations Greatest Hits. (I am just a little bit embarrassed to say that my first eight track was John Denver. John Denver, by the way, is not generally considered to be part of the Motown sound.)

Michael Jackson was two months old when I was born. Two months after that, Barry Gordy started the Tamla Records, the first Motown label.

One of the highlights of my 2009 trip to New Orleans was singing some Motown and doo wop with Jay-Ray & Gee in front of the Hotel Monteleone.

photo by Michael Middleton

And now the most important fact... Sven (in conjunction with John the Revelator) will be hosting Motown Karaoke at MJ Cafe, every Sunday night, starting Dec. 5. Karaoke starts at 7:30 PM.

MJ Cafe
A relaxed eatery and martini bar
6901 W. Brown Deer Rd
Milwaukee
(414) 377-2524

Finally some real research on karaoke!

2010-11-24T06:00:00.001-06:00

Dr. Kevin Brown (associate prof at the University of Missouri) earned his doctorate from the University of Colorado doing an ethnographic study of karaoke. Finally, a university with a KhD program! Here we have an excerpt from his thesis.

Brown speaks of the "karaoke dream", which he defines as: "the fantasy that one will be 'discovered' singing karaoke and go on to make their mark on the 'big time' entertainment industry." Brown discusses a karaoke singer by the name of Roger who had demo CDs made, and was talking with people who had contacts in Vegas.

Obviously, a lot of karaoke singers have something of that fantasy. I personally have a fantasy of singing just once to a huge crowd with a great band behind me. Just once, though. I certainly don't want to have to spend a year or two of voice training. And I definitely have no interest whatsoever in spending the years and years of singing every weekend in every dive in Hoboken in order to pay my dues!!

But karaoke is not the way to actually reach the karaoke dream. My research ("getting discovered through karaoke", and "update on getting discovered") shows that nobody made it to the big time by jumping up on stage at a karaoke bar. Well... maybe someone did. I just haven't found them yet.

If a large percentage of karaoke singers were doing karaoke in the hope of becoming a star, then they would all get disappointed and just stay home and watch Glee. Since karaoke appears to still be popular, I am guessing that people are not actually trying to reach that dream, but rather they are singing karaoke in order to experience a facsimile of that dream, if only for a brief moment.

In a previous blog I asserted that karaoke was an opportunity for people to sing in groups. I submit this blog as reason #2 - karaoke is an opportunity to sample what it feels like to be a rock star.

This is just darn silly!

2010-11-23T06:00:00.002-06:00

I am sorry that I missed another important Texan contribution to the silly places to sing karaoke hall of fame. Karaoke in a taxi??!?! That's just darn silly!

Francisco E. Loaiza, formerly of New Orleans, runs a taxi in Dallas. Same rates as the other taxis, but there is an added feature. Karaoke.

Damn! what a silly idea. Why didn't I think of it first?!?!?!

Odd places for karaoke

2010-11-22T06:00:00.000-06:00

Sydney Australia is a pretty happening place when it comes to karaoke. Not only can you go on a karaoke ghost tour, but you can also hire the karaoke bus to get you there. Yes, they do have a stripper pole.

Texas is another unexpected hotbed of unexpected places to sing karaoke. How about singing at the
Houston airport? Or, you could visit Super H Mart Korean grocery store in Carrolton, TX which offers 232 types of noodles, and (naturally) karaoke.

I regret that Mable Peabody's Beauty Parlor and Chainsaw Repair in Denton, Texas is apparently no longer open. It was a great place to drop off your chainsaw for sharpening, get your nails done, and sing a little "Boot Scootin' Boogie". They had karaoke every night.

New Orleans Karaoke Cam

2010-11-21T06:00:00.020-06:00

This just in...

The live KaraokeCam at Cat's Meow in New Orleans is temporarily out of service. I will stay on top of this breaking story and post updates as they come in.

Getting caught singing karaoke

2010-11-20T06:00:00.000-06:00

My wife, the lovely Gypsy Songstress, has often told me that I can flirt as much as I like, but I better not be singing any duets with other women. Of course, I know she's kidding. She really doesn't like me to flirt much, either!

Maury Povich featured a case of 'til karaoke do us part. Raven and Kenny were karaoke sweethearts. But when Raven caught Kevin singing "their song" with another woman at the karaoke bar, she began to suspect...

Cheating by means of karaoke wasn't evidently hot enough for Maury's show, so Kenny was seduced backstage by a very sexy actress. She gave him another chance, but Kenny and Raven are now divorced.

Debra Rowley of Ocali, FL was incensed when she found her ex-husband singing karaoke with another woman. She should have listened to her lawyer's advice and taken him to the highest court, where Judge Maury could pass sentence.

Instead, Rowley took justice into her own hands. She will serve at least seven years for driving her car through the porch where her ex-husband was sitting.

Her lawyer must not be worth his salt. I mean, couldn't he get her off on justifiable attempted murder? I mean... it was her ex-husband, for goodness sake! And he was singing a duet!! I mean really, what more justification does she need to try to murder the guy?

Love does not enter into all of today's stories of cheating karaoke. A woman in England was caught cheating the government out of disability payments when she was seen singing karaoke at a pub. Anita Todd is suffering from multiple ailments, and supposedly is not able to even walk more than a few steps, let alone belt out some karaoke.

Oh what a tangled web we weave....

Half naked karaoke that I have missed

2010-11-19T06:00:00.001-06:00

I found out that I missed the lingerie karaoke party at "Supperclub" in San Francisco. Evidently this is an annual thing.

I was in Johannesburg and Cape Town last spring, but I missed Bikini Karaoke at Glendore Arms in Port Elizabeth. I couldn't even find any pics of the ladies in bikinis, even thought I found their FaceBook page.

Here is a clip from another karaoke performance that I missed. Maybe this one wouldn't have been worth the trip to Tokyo? I don't know. I missed it.

I also missed this karaoke show:
Oct. 27 — DJ Free Beer & Naked Karaoke, 9 p.m. to 1 a.m., T.G.I. Fridays, 9430 Hwy. 16, Onalaska, free.
And here I am only a four hour drive from Onalaska! I don't recall what I was doing on the 27th, but how could it have been as much fun as Naked Karaoke. I mean really?

So much half-naked karaoke. And so much of it that I have missed. Sigh. I will have to address this when New Year's resolutions come around again.

Pet karaoke...

2010-11-18T06:00:00.000-06:00

By now I am sure you have seen the videos of Mishka the husky who says "I Love You", and who sings Justin Beiber.

It should come as no surprise that pet karaoke is on it's way. If you just happen to be near Pensacola, FL on Saturday, Check out American Pet Idol at Pet Fest 2010: Paws & Applause for Your Pets.

If pets like to ham it up, they can enter Dancing with the Dogs and American Pet Idol, the search to find the best singing pet. Dancing with the Dogs is new," said [Meg] Peltier [Chamber of Commerce]. "It will be set up like American Bandstand. The last dog standing wins."

Also new is American Pet Idol, which is pet karaoke. "A lot of animals sing when their owners sing," said Peltier.

The Gypsy Songstress

2010-11-17T06:00:00.003-06:00

Just to clarify... There were some photos that appeared on the internet, labeled "Gyspy Songstress". This is a soprano, apparently from Liverpool, who wears too much makeup (for my taste) and sings in the street, apparently giving away leaflets.

Do not be fooled. This Gypsy Songstress is not my Gypsy Songstress. Mine very rarely wears red. Below is a pic of the real Gypsy Songstress in all her plumage

I had to do a bit of research to find out who had stolen the name of my little songbird. I seems that the woman in the first picture is actually a woman named "Gypsy" - no songstress. Whoever took the picture had affixed the "Songstress " part.

Her original name was Sarah Watkins. She is an opera singer. Another mark against her in my book. I'm not maligning opera, or any of its aficionados. I personally just don't care for it. Or for heavy makeup.

Here is a video of Gypsy Watkins, opera singer from Birkdale, England.

I dunno... her voice sounds OK, for an opera singer. I really don't consider myself a seasoned critic of opera. I just know that I would much rather wake up listening to the warbling of my own Gypsy Songstress.

BTW... When Sarah Watkins had her name legally changed to Gypsy, she asked her husband to change his name to "Purple". He complied. I guess I could put up with changing my name from Revelator to Purple. John the Purplator? Purple the Revelator? The makeup, the opera, though? I don't think I could deal with that.

Being replaced by a karaoke machine

2010-11-16T06:00:00.000-06:00

Willie Jolley left showbiz when his gig as a nightclub singer was replaced by a karaoke machine. Rather than becoming demoralized, he has become a motivational speaker.

Tony Hampton was also replaced by a karaoke machine. Up until recently, he was the organist for a crematorium in Northampton, England. Yes, that's right. Karaoke hymns at a funeral. And evidently, there are some people who are not happy about this. People who are upset are invited to read Karaoke Funeral by Tania Rochelle. I have no idea whether the book of poetry would be helpful. But just in case.

Even the World Cup is not immune to the infiltration of karaoke. Due to recent drops in ratings, the penalty shoot outs will be replaced by karaoke contests.

Celebrity karaoke - Gerard Butler

2010-11-15T19:19:00.000-06:00

Gerard Butler (from Phantom of the Opera, and 300) is apparently an old hand at karaoke. Here is a clip of him from July singing at a karaoke spot in Detroit. Demi Moore and Michelle Monaghan also hit the tiny stage that night.

Butler celebrated his 41st birthday in New York by singing Wonderwall and Mustang Sally with John Mayer.
http://www.examiner.com/celebrity-headlines-in-los-angeles/gerard-butler-s-awesome-karaoke-birthday-party
http://www.monstersandcritics.com/people/news/article_1599137.php/Gerard-Butler-does-karaoke

The very model of a modern US president

2010-11-14T12:02:00.000-06:00

Ok, so this is not karaoke, but it is musical. Those who are familiar with Gilbert and Sullivan's Pirates of Penzance will get a kick out of this.

Are there any karaoke fans who are Gilbert and Sullivan fans? I mean, other than my darling wife?

An online interview with the Revelator

2010-11-13T13:02:00.001-06:00

I am proud to say that my fame is starting to catch up with my over-inflated ego!There is an online interview of me posted at Karaoke HQ.

Thank you, Kat!

Gwenyth Paltrow on Glee!

2010-11-08T19:42:00.000-06:00

Gwenyth Paltrow has been a long time advocate of karaoke. She has never (to my knowledge) turned down a request to lend her star power to an event for one of the karaoke charities, such as KOUGH Karaoke Opportunities for Unkempt Geeks and the Homeless, or ERK (Equal Rights for Karaokephiles). Many will recall that it was her sheer determination that brought together KK (Karaokeholic Konfidentialous) that has does so much to turn around the lives of karaoke addicts everywhere.

Gwenyth has appeared in two of my previous blogs. The first was for appearing in the greatest karaoke flick ever produced, Crusin'. Just recently, I published a blog where I quoted some bloviator who had the unmitigated audacity to say that Crusin' is a movie that only a karaoke fanatic could love.

Gwenyth finds her way to my blog a third time. My sources tell me that she will be appearing on Glee, which has been voted an Emmy in 2010 in the category "TV show that is most like karaoke in it's hokeyness, but which isn't quite as bad as American Idol". She will be singing the original words to Cee-Lo's recent hit song: "Forget You".

Karaoke quotes

2010-11-07T12:53:00.000-06:00

Karaoke was big news this last week, as it always is. I have selected a number of quotes involving "karaoke" from this weeks news. I dunno... I think karaoke might be getting a bad rap.

On the Japanese pension plan
"Take the total number of years worked, plus the years spent in working overtime, minus one day for each cup of instant ramen you've had, minus two years if you smoke, four years if you smoke and sing karaoke at the same time..."

Look for the upcoming Surgeon General's reporting linking smoking and karaoke....

On the closing of Moe's Bar
"I know it's a very popular bar. But please understand what a horrible establishment this has been for the surrounding neighborhood. ... We have had to put up with loud music nightly--often Sunday night is the worst. Not to mention Tuesday nights when we are assaulted with drunken karaoke."

Drunken karaoke? What???

Drunken karaoke brawls in Parliament
"A LABOUR MP is facing investigation over claims he was involved in a drunken brawl at a karaoke party in the Houses of Parliament."

Drunken brawl at karaoke? What???

On Courtney Love and the fashion designers she hangs out with

"[T]he designers, never shy of publicity or celebrity, are using [Courtney Love] like a virtual karaoke machine that will perform rock renditions of "Bad Romance" and "Like a Prayer" on command at their parties.

Oh. Now that's an image that's gonna haunt me.

On the movie Duets
"The Oscar-winner [Gwenyth Paltrow] — who established her onscreen pipes in “Duets,” a movie with a plot that only karaoke fanatics could love..."

What? Didn't everybody love that movie?!?!?

On the group "The Dan Band"
"Best described as a karaoke act gone terribly wrong, cult-comedy star Dan Finnerty gives familiar tunes what they deserve. At the Wilbur Theatre, 617-248-9700."

Karaoke gone wrong? What???

On professional business coach Mike Benton of Maryland
"While he says, 'In coaching, you’re either karaoke or Bon Jovi—I’m still karaoke,' his goal is to touch millions of lives, sharing the aphorisms that have helped him, such as, 'You either make your economy, or your economy makes you.'"

Hmmm.... should I hire Bon Jovi to coach my business? Or Mike Benton??

Porn star karaoke

2010-11-06T06:00:00.000-05:00

I found out about Porn Star Karaoke from NPR. No, really. National Public Radio.

The NPR story was about Alex Jablonski and Michael Totten, who decided to do a documentary once a month for a year. Almost like a certain karaoke blogger who has written a karaoke blog every day for over a week now!

Jablonski and Totten called the project Sparrow Songs. You can see all twelve of the short documentaries at their website, or on vimeo. The first documentary is about the fellow who inspired them, a song writer who has put together an album every month for a year. Documentary #5 is assembled from a twelve hour visit to a donut shop. Documentary #8 is about a circus family.

And documentary #3 is about the karaoke bar Sardo's of Burbank. You can go sing there pretty much every night, but on Tuesday night, they offer something with a twist. There are porn stars there.

Here it's a relaxed environment where people can get together, have some drinks, enjoy themselves and see your favorite performer do something ... out of the ordinary, which is, get up on stage and sing rather than go on stage and have sex.

Sardo's put together their own video of Pornstar Karaoke. I dunno. Somehow they missed out on the seedy and pathetic parts of the Jablonski / Totten documentary.

By the way, Sardo's has family night on Fridays. I am John the Revelator Seymour, and I am no relation to Seymour Satin, owner of Sardo's.

Karaoke movie premieres Nov 26

2010-11-05T06:00:00.000-05:00

Finally! They are doing a movie about karaoke, scheduled to open on November 26!! It's been a long dry spell since Duets. We did get that quick little snippet in everybody's favorite movie Sex and the City II. Finally karaoke will be taken as serious mainstream stuff.

That's what I was thinking when I first heard about Freak Out. Then I started digging for more details.

The movie stars 18 year old Jillian Clare, who plays on Days Of Our Lives. What? Sandra Bullock wasn't available?

The movie is being produced by the folks who bring you the teen soap Victorious on Nickelodeon. Uh-oh. Second warning sign. I don't spend a whole lot of time watching teenie-bopper shows on Nickelodeon.

The movie is about a karaoke competition. The winner gets to go out with Jade's boyfriend, Beck. OMG! How can they defile something as sacred as a karaoke competition?!?!? Oh well. I guess I need to wait longer for that Great American Karaoke Movie.

Time to karaoke with Barbie!

2010-11-04T06:00:00.004-05:00

I saw a Facebook post saying that Mattel has come out with a line of three Barbie ladies of the 80s.

The news is a bit dated, since the dolls were introduced almost a year ago. But still, Mattel has immortalized three great ladies of rock in the 80s: Cyndi Lauper, Joan Jett, and Debbie Harry. And there is at least one more lady of rock from the 80s who has become a Barbie Girl: Cher. Note that the Cher doll is wearing her uber-sexy outfit from her 1989 If I Could Turn Back Time video. Wow. That still gives me chills. (Honey... my birthday is coming up...)

These Barbie dolls tie back to a recent post of mine, where I reported spending literally hours of time painstakingly compiling an almost infinite number of lists into the definitive list of best songs of the 80s. Naturally, it makes sense to wonder how Mattel did at picking their dolls? Did they pick the best of the best?

Actually, Mattel didn't do too bad. Three of the four ladies are on my definitive list. Here are the most popular songs from these three ladies and where they ranked.

Cyndi Lauper - Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (#18)
Joan Jett - I Love Rock 'N Roll (#19)
Debbie Harry - Call Me (#58)

Cher, surprisingly enough didn't make it on my best of the 80s list. Evidently, none of the ten websites I looked at knew that If I Could Turn Back Time was recorded in 1989. That's too bad.

Cher and Joan Jett did make it on my list of crowd pleasing karaoke songs. I am guessing Cher might be embarrassed about this, but I Got You Babe is her only entry in the best of karaoke. It is the #2 duet. Joan Jett's I Love Rock 'N Roll was a well deserved #9 on the list of best karaoke.

I think Mattel missed an important female artist from the 80s, though. Madonna had two hits that were high on my list:

Madonna - Like a Virgin (#4), Material Girl (#21).

Incidentally, Mattel also sells a karaoke Barbie. Well... actually it is an American Idol Barbie. But, you can certainly pretend that she is singing karaoke.

OMG is that bad PR!

2010-11-03T06:00:00.001-05:00

On June 22, Hilton Worldwide got some of the worst PR imaginable. I quote from USA Today:

Chinese authorities shut down one of Hilton's flagship hotels in the country indefinitely as they investigate an alleged brothel operating in the hotel's independently run karaoke club, reports say.

OMG... they run karaoke at that hotel?!?!?!? Stay away from that place!

This is too much....

2010-11-02T06:00:00.000-05:00

Come on guys... enough maligning of karaoke!!!

http://www.buyawardsandtrophies.com/resin-karaoke-toilet-trophy-p-2476.html?PID=4010397&refid=cj

Good website for karaoke articles

2010-11-01T06:00:00.003-05:00

I found a Facebook page that is posting links to a lot of good karaoke articles. The Facebook page is called "MySpace Karaoke". (I wonder how Facebook feels about that!??!)

I just took a little stroll through recent postings... they have a couple videos of folks in the Sugarland karaoke contest, a link to an article with karaoke tips for guys who can't sing, another link with tips on how to avoid karaoke embarrassment, and a link to a list of good karaoke tunes for Halloween.

I'm liking it. Thanks Kat!!

BTW... for information about the MySpace karaoke contest, visit a previous blog of mine, or have a look at their site.

Who do you want to sing karaoke with?

2010-10-31T06:00:00.002-05:00

There was a recent poll in Singapore asking which artist you would most like to sing karaoke with. Naturally, my absolute first choice would be the Gypsy Songstress, who just happens to be my wife. It's all very convenient the way that works, cuz we do get a chance to sing karaoke together. :)

But... I think their question had more to do with fantasy, and real pros rather than pro wannabees.

For me, I think I would have fun singing with Bette Midler. She has such a bawdy in your face style and I love her voice. Here is a pic of Bette. The one on the left is not me, by the way. It's Gladys Knight, without any Pips.

How about you? What celebrity or performer would you like to join on a karaoke stage? Add a comment to tell me who you would like to get up on a karaoke stage with, and why.

Claudia Schiffer "admits" to singing karaoke

2010-10-30T12:50:00.000-05:00

Believe it or not, supermodel Claudia Schiffer admitted in an interview that she sang karaoke at a party.

"I think I had a little too much to drink and it ended out with me being totally out of character and do a lot of karaoke... cuz I know me and I'm quite shy..."

Sigh. Why do people need to make excuses to explain why they sing? It isn't all that nasty of a disease, but it is catchy!

A few goofy karaoke videos

2010-10-27T06:00:00.001-05:00

Karaoke for the deaf

Star Trek karaoke

Best songs of the 80s

2010-10-26T06:00:00.004-05:00

Best of the 80's
I found out that I will be doing an 80's themed gig! I have to be honest. I pretty much checked out of the music scene in the 80's. Career, kids... Tragically, life kinda got in the way of music for a while. I have my priorities straight now, thank god, but I needed a refresher course on what's good from the 80's.

So, I did a little Googling for "best music of the 80's". I picked out ten websites (see below) with lots and lots of songs - most had a top 100 list. And I compiled votes. Here is a list of all the 27 songs that got at least 5 votes. So, if you happen to be coming to the Milwaukee Art Museum on Friday, Dec. 17, stop by for karaoke. Here is a list of songs you could sing.

Votes	Song	Artist
8	When Doves Cry	Prince
7	Billie Jean	Michael Jackson
7	Don't You Want Me?	Human League
7	Like A Virgin	Madonna
7	Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)	Eurythmics
7	Take on Me	A-ha
6	Every Breath You Take	The Police
6	Hungry Like the Wolf	Duran Duran
6	Livin' on a Prayer	Bon Jovi
6	Pour Some Sugar on Me	Def Leopard
6	Tainted Love	Soft Cell
6	Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go	Wham!
6	With or Without You	U2
5	Beat It	Michael Jackson
5	Don't You (Forget About Me)	Simple Minds
5	Everybody Wants To Rule the World	Tears for Fears
5	Faith	George Michael
5	Girls Just Wanna Have Fun	Cyndi Lauper
5	I Love Rock N' Roll	Joan Jett & The Blackhearts
5	Kiss	Prince
5	Material Girl	Madonna
5	Nasty	Janet Jackson
5	Sweet Child O' Mine	Guns N' Roses
5	Total Eclipse of the Heart	Bonnie Tyler
5	Walk Like An Egyptian	Bangles
5	Walk This Way	Run D.M.C.
5	You Shook Me All Night Long	AC/DC

Other posts in my "best songs" series
Crowd pleaser karaoke songs
Worst karaoke picks
Best slow dance songs of all time

Websites that I collected data from
http://hubpages.com/hub/Top-100-Songs-of-the-80s
http://www.liketotally80s.com/best_80s_music_videos.html
http://rateyourmusic.com/list/Clarkone68/top_100_songs_of_the_80s
http://www.nutsie.com/top100sradio/Top%20100%2080s%20Songs/2094767
http://www.digitaldreamdoor.com/pages/best_dance-80s.html
http://www.80sxchange.com/radio.htm
http://www.squidoo.com/100-greatest-songs-of-the-80s
http://mag.weddingcentral.com.au/music/songs/top1080s.htm
http://jeantop10.com/top100/72-music-charts/250-top-100-songs-80s
http://www.buzzle.com/articles/best-songs-of-the-80s.html

Heavy metal, horror flicks, and Jewish music

2010-10-25T06:00:00.001-05:00

My wife sent me a link to a review of a new CD. It's a collection of Jewish songs as performed by black singers. You can hear some clips from the CD, or buy it, from Amazon: Black Sabbath: The Secret Musical History of Black-Jewish Relations. My wife was not terribly impressed. She likes to hear Hebrew spoken (or sung) like someone who knows Hebrew.

I thought the name for the CD was a bit odd. Perhaps more than a little. I mean, the two words individually kind of fit, although I am never sure whether "black" is PC, and the songs on the CD are not all songs for the sabbath. I guess "sabbath" could make one think about Jews, so maybe that's ok.

On the other hand, when you put the two words together, there are a lot of connotations that don't really fit with the CD.

Naturally, the title first made me think of the band Black Sabbath. Ozzy Osbourne was one of the founders of the group. I just don't recognize much of the music. I never was all that into heavy metal. The black-Jewish CD is not heavy metal, by the way.

But, now I gotta know where the band got their name from, cuz that's just part of my schtick, as shown by a few previous posts:
Where did AC/DC get their name?
Which came first, the doobie or the brother?

The band was formerly known as quite simply as "Earth". No wind. No fire. Just Earth. When they heard of another group by the simple name, they realized they had to change the name. As it turns out, the theater across the street from their practice space was running a Boris Karloff film called "Black Sabbath" when this all came out.

Osbourne wrote a song called Black Sabbath, and they later took on that name. This is just a technicality, but it sounds like the band was named after the song.

So, what about the film called Black Sabbath? The film is a collection of three unrelated horror stories starring Boris Karloff, closely following the Italian film The Three Faces of Fear. Neither Karloff nor the director of the original Italian film were Jewish, so where did the name of the film come from?

The director of the Italian version of the film, Mario Bava, had previously produced a popular movie called "Black Sunday". The directors chose "Black Sabbath" so as to ride on the coat tails of the previous movie. Other than the director, the two movies had nothing in common. I am guessing that there was a Jew in the studio who came up with the phrase Black Sabbath. Imagine that. A Jew in Hollywood.

Where did the phrase Black Sunday come from? Why do I say that the phrase probably came from someone who was Jewish?

Shabbat is the Jewish day of rest, the day of sabbath. It starts at sundown on Friday and continues until Saturday at sundown. Certain of these Shabbats are the special, such as Shabbat Chazon, also called Black Sunday. This Shabbat precedes a period of mourning called Tisha B'Av, which commemorates the day of the year that saw the destruction of two temples. This has been called the saddest day in Jewish history.

The Torah verse for that day (Isaiah 1:1-27) is particularly gloomy.
People laden with iniquity!
Brood of evildoers!
Depraved children!
...
And every heart is sick.
From head to foot
No spot is sound:
All bruises, and welts,
And festering sores —

God does not sound all that pleased with Israel at this time.
Your new moons and fixed seasons
Fill Me with loathing;
They are become a burden to Me,
I cannot endure them.
And when you lift up your hands,
I will turn My eyes away from you;
Though you pray at length,
I will not listen.

Wow. Heavy stuff.

But... to summarize my story.

The band heavy metal band Black Sabbath was named after the song Black Sabbath. This song was in turn named after the horror movie Black Sabbath. This movie was name after another horror flick, Black Sunday, to tie it to this previous money maker. The movie name Black Sabbath was also a reference to the gloomiest day in Jewish history.

I think if the folks who put together this CD would have done a little bit of research, they might have chosen a different name.

Do politics and karaoke mix?

2010-10-23T06:00:00.003-05:00

Senate hopeful Rodney Glassman is trying to unseat McCain. While this isn't exactly karaoke... it might as well be.

Shannon Roberts has her eye on a house seat in Florida, and she is throwing a little karaoke party this coming Saturday. Cost is only $10!

Blogojevich is no longer in politics so he figgers he can come out of the closet and sing a little Elvis at a block party.

In Wisconsin politics, Republican gubernatorial candidate Scott Walker is not ashamed to admit that he met his wife while singing karaoke at Saz's. Risky....

And the final karaoke / political mixing...

Ron Johnson directed and starred in a short movie called "Karaoke King". The movie is a mockumentary about a guy who made it from karaoke singer to stardom. Clearly this was a mockumentary, since no one ever got discovered singing karaoke.

Ron Johnson is running against Russ Feingold for Wisconsin's US Senate seat. Johnson says that the scientists who have demonstrated that global warming is the result of human activity are crazy. Johnson said "It's far more likely that it's just sunspot activity or just something in the geologic eons of time." Since Johnson almost has an MBA and is the CEO of a sheet extruder company, his opinion is clearly more credible than the hundreds of scientists who have spent their lives doing research.

Ron Johnson opposed the Child Victims Act, which would allow prosecution of pedophiles when the statue of limitations has run out. He explained that the act "could actually have the perverse effect of leading to additional victims of sexual abuse if individuals recognize that organizations are at risk of becoming less likely to report sexual abuse". What?

These are actually two different people. The first guy? He believes in karaoke and he would like to believe in the myth that someone could become a star by singing karaoke. I think I could vote for that Ron Johnson.
The Ron Johnson who is running for Senate believes in his own myths. I don't think I could vote for that guy.

World record karaoke marathon

2010-10-21T07:24:00.000-05:00

Five hundred artists from all around India have just taken the world record for the longest karaoke marathon in Vashi, India. They sang over 7,000 songs to log a total of 579 hours. (That's 24 days and 3 hours.)

http://www.worldrecordsnews.com/2010/10/worlds-longest-karaoke-marathon.html

This shatters the previous record set in China of 456 hours, 2 min, 5 sec.
http://community.guinnessworldrecords.com/_Longest-karoke-marathon-by-multiple-participants/blog/223028/7691.html

Other karaoke records:
The largest group of people to sing karaoke simultaneously was 160,000. This was at a NASCAR race in Bristol Tennessee. They sang Garth Brook's "Friends in Low Places".

http://community.guinnessworldrecords.com/_Fast-Furious-at-Bristol-Motor-Speedway/blog/593332/7691.html

I don't think this has been ratified by the folks at Guinness, but the longest karaoke song that I am aware of is Don MacLean's "American Pie", which is 8 minutes and 47 seconds.

Karaoke robot

2010-10-16T06:00:00.000-05:00

The VCR was invented in the mid sixties to free us from the drudgery of having to watch television. Texting is a more recent labor-saving device which allows us to avoid the drudgery of actually having to speak with other people.

Finally, Japanese scientists have developed a robot that can save us from the drudgery and humiliation of having to sing karaoke.

What's next? I have just applied for a patent for a robot that can swim laps for my wife, thus saving her from all that wasted effort of exercise. Once the Swimbot is perfected, she can just send this device to the gym, hit "snooze" on her alarm clock, and catch a few more zzzzs.

I have another labor saving device under development to compliment the lap swimming robot. I am calling it the Excuse-o-matic. Whenever my wife says, "Hey, you wanna go swimming with my Swimbot?" the Excuse-o-matic will generate a quasi-random excuse. "I need to get to work early, like before noon." "I have a headache." "My arm hurts." "I really should, shouldn't I?" Then, we will be able to cuddle up, both of us guilt-free, knowing that our responsibilities are being taken care of through the wonders of technology.

Waiting for the call

2010-10-15T06:00:00.006-05:00

I have been sleeping with my cell phone on the night stand... making sure that it is always fully charged. I keep expecting each morning to get that early morning call that all Nobel laureates get. "Hello, is this John the Revelator?"

So far, no call. I guess the Nobel committee is still in deliberation on the 2010 award for karaoke. That's good. I certainly wouldn't want them to give me the award frivolously.

I'll keep you posted.

Home made guitars and spaghetti sauce - marketing appled to romance

2010-10-14T06:00:00.004-05:00

Warning -- for those of you expecting a dorky blogpost about karaoke, please check out my previous blogpost. Or I'm sure my next one will be more on the topic of karaoke. For those who are ok with "sappy" -- read further.

A friend of mine is building his own guitar. I think that's pretty cool. You can follow his progress on Steve's blog. The picture below is from his blog. Note the clever product placement. Steve really knows how to market stuff. I imagine he is getting some big bucks from Miller.

I ran into Steve last week. When I mentioned this to my wife, I was reminded of the crucial part that Steve played in me meeting my wife. In a previous blog, I admitted that I kinda like my wife.I lied. I really like her. I am totally infatuated with this woman, and have been for almost six years. And it's all because of Steve.

Well, maybe not all because of him. But he did play a small part.

I admire Steve because he does a lot of totally different things well. He was originally trained as an engineer, but he wound up in marketing - market intelligence to be specific. He also is a pretty decent photographer, does woodworking and has an outlandish blog about pencils and pens and PDAs and notepads and notebooks, and other stuff. And he has a blog about numbers. I typed in the number 12,647 (a favorite number of mine) and found out that this was the population of Brigantine City, NJ in 2008.

Six years ago, Steve gave me some practical advice about profiles on match.com. He said "John, you gotta put something in your profile that will set you apart from all the other schmucks out there." Rather than have the usual "I am incredibly good looking and very smart and successful and I love NASCAR" type of profile, he changed his profile to a description of the perfect date. I guess chicks really dig that whole "holding hands while you walk on the seashore" bit, cuz he found a lovely woman who he married.

I took his advice to heart and changed my profile into my recipe for spaghetti sauce, starting with the smell of garlic in olive oil and ending with the choice of wine.

It worked. The Gypsy Songstress took my bait. Within hours of me changing my profile, I had a date with Madelaine. Nine months later we were married.

Thank you, Steve.

Undercover karaoke, the TV series!

2010-10-13T19:58:00.000-05:00

In a previous blog I told about a great gag from the folks at FunnyOrDie. For this video, they recruited Jewel to dress up, or rather, to dress down and visit a karaoke bar. The results were hilarious. One patron consoled her about her looks: "You can be an ugly girl with a voice like that and get laid all the time." The video of this charade has had over three million views.

And now the idea has been taken up by TBS. They will be running a series called "Undercover Karaoke". In each half-hour episode, some rock star will don a disguise and rock out at some unsuspecting karaoke bar.

I would urge all my readers to start visiting unsuspecting karaoke bars on the off chance they might get to hear Mick Jagger or Cher.

http://zikkir.com/et/47233
http://www.deadline.com/2010/10/tbs-back-in-the-reality-game-with-funny-or-dies-undercover-karaoke/

Bad karaoke dates, and one good one

2010-10-12T06:00:00.002-05:00

You may wonder how a date that includes karaoke could ever be bad... or then again, maybe you never stopped to think about it.

Well, a karaoke date could go bad, I suppose, if your date strips down to his pants while singing "The Real Slim Shady". Or how about if your blind date takes you to a private karaoke room and starts off singing "Springtime for Hitler"? Could be risky.

I was running karaoke one night when a fellow dropped off a slip, telling me that he wanted to impress the gal he was out with cuz it was a first date. When he got to stage, he announced that to the whole crowd, and yes... he was impressive. Excellent voice. The two of them left rather quickly after he sang. That was either a very good sign or a very bad sign. I never found out.

Despite the fact that I spent a lot of time in karaoke bars between marriages, I never met anyone while singing karaoke. I thought I made it pretty clear whenever I got the mic that I was single and looking. I dunno, maybe women don't go for that whole "single and desperate" vibe? Or maybe I just should have read this advice back when I was single and looking?

Josh suggests that the girl maybe better not suggest karaoke for a first date, cuz he's gonna be trolling for his next first date. I learned from a pool shark that you always need to think about lining yourself up for the next shot. It never occurred to me to apply this strategy to dating!

The folks at match.com also figger that karaoke on a first date is just not conducive to romance. Maybe their advice is worthwhile. After all, match.com did find me a wife. She sings karaoke, by the way. and I kinda like her.

As I write this, a memory comes back to me of a very special night at Clifford's, one of the karaoke places I frequented when I was single. There was a couple who were regulars. They often sang duets together. Cute couple. Nice people. One night, he proposed to her on stage. It was beautiful. Maybe karaoke can go together with romance.

Heaven

2010-10-10T16:41:00.000-05:00

http://www.flickr.com/photos/winton/4863754294/#

What more can I say?

Jennifer Aniston is a karaoke-phile

2010-10-09T06:00:00.002-05:00

Yes, Jennifer Aniston is one of us. She is on location in Clarksville, Georgia and had a karaoke night out with the cast. To top it off, she hired a KJ to host a girl's night out at the place she is renting. By the way, Aniston can sing. Ellen Degeneres says that she would "put her through to the next round".

Wow. That's a gig I would like. Jennifer... if you are reading this... give me a call next time you're around Milwaukee, ok?