Thanks for everything, Julie Newmar!

Google Analytics is a great toy. I use it to track the number of visits that my websites get. This particular blog (http://john-the-revelator-does-karaoke.blogspot.com/) is pretty busy, I am proud to say. Since January, this blog has been visited by 3,007 different people from 1,457 different cities in 111 different countries. I have had visitors from every state in the nation, with the exception of Alaska. Sarah is just not that big into karaoke, I guess.

I just noticed something odd, though. A post of mine from the beginning of April suddenly started getting a lot of visits.

From the date I posted (April 3, 2011) to July 22, the page was viewed a total of 177 times by 108 different people. That's kind of impressive, but not totally surprising. I mean... it's about Julie Newmar! And patents! What could be a better prescription for a popular blog post?

But on July 23rd, it took off. There were 27 page views on that one day, and 37 on the next. As I write this (July 25 at 8:30 PM) there have been 15 today.

It is not totally weird for a page to get that many visits. I have a number of popular posts: My post on tele-osculation devices has seen 258 visits in the last month. And nobody even knows what that word means!

What is weird is that it suddenly took off. Up until the beginning of July, the site had not seen more than 9 visits in a day. Holy blog post about Julie Newmar, Batman! I need to get to the bottom of this!  Why am I suddenly getting so many visits?  Could this be the work of the Riddler????

My fingers flashed over the keys at the Google Analytics site. I quickly found that this was probably not the work of one person. The visits came from 62 different cities, with Oxnard, CA, Louisville, KY, Dunn Loring, VA and Parsippany, NJ heading up the list. I am hard pressed to see a pattern.

It occurred to me to check the news to see if Julie Newmar happened to have been in the mews - excuse me - the news recently. Sure enough. I found that, along with Adam West and Burt Ward, she spoke at Comic-Con in San Diego on July 25th, celebrating the 45th anniversary of the Batman TV series.

So, I missed by big chance to see Julie in person. I could have gone to San Diego. Of course, I would have been mostly bored by the conference cuz I am not really all that into comic books. But... I hold on to the hope that Julie herself might read this blog post and send me an email. Maybe she will visit Milwaukee and we can go to Starbucks and talk about patents?

Then again, maybe this post is all about the power of the internet to connect things and also about how to get your website noticed. That part is kinda cool.

Julie Newmar

Ok, so I know that Julie Newmar has nothing to do with karaoke, or even with singing. But... I found out something interesting about her, and I just have to share it with somebody!

Julie Newmar is of course known for her portrayal of Cat Woman on the Batman TV show. When I hear her name, that's what I remember. I was only eight years old when the Batman TV series came on, but somehow that face and that tight bodysuit made an impression on my pre-pubescent mind.

Another image of Julie Newmar was firmly lodged in my post-pubescent mind. This image was from People magazine in 1977. At that time, I was old enough to understand the word "sexy" as something other than an abstract concept.

Actually, I don't remember reading the article. In fact, I didn't associate her name with this image until I found it on her official website.

Have I gotten your attention? Ok. Now for the learning part. Julie Newmar was awarded three patents. Really. Notice the heading on the top of the page? Having trouble finding it?  First look at her amazingly voluptuous tush. Then move your eyes slightly to the right and then up near the top of the image.

I am guessing most of the guys missed the word "INVENTORS". Probably because it's outlined text. But, I'm getting to a point here about her amazingly voluptuous tush. Why is her tush so amazingly voluptuous, you may ask? It has to do with two of Newmar's patents.

US Patents 3,914,799 and 4,003,094 are for "Pantyhose with shaping band for cheeky derrier relief". The patent issues the problem that "Usually the more flattening of the wearer's lower abdomen (tummy) that is achieved, the more tendency there is to flatten and denaturalize the wearer's derriere". Flat tummy, flat butt. Women who wear pantyhose generally want the tummy flat, but not the derriere.

The secret of this invention lies in "an elastic shaping band 21 (substantially more elastic than the fabric from which the panty portion 11 of the pantyhose is made and typically of the same material as a conventional waist band) is connected to the rear panty portion 17 and extends from the vicinity of the crotch zone 16 to the vicinity 22 of the elastic waist encircling band 13." (Please refer to the image from the patent for the numbers.

Newmar's other patent (US 3,935,865) is for a brassiere. The purpose of this patent is thus: "Many women want to appear freer in their movements and to give a braless impression, yet they need some support."

She developed a line of pantyhose based on this patent, under the name "Nudemar". I found one reference online that said this line was popular in the 70's and 80's. No doubt the picture in People boosted the sales along with many a tush.

We also learn from this patent that "Breasts of young women tend to be protuberant whereas breasts of older women tend to be pendulous. Protuberant breasts are supported by fibrous tissue strands known as ligaments of Astley Cooper." This brassiere patent also teaches that Howard Hughes developed bras.

As I was relating this information to my wife, a third Julie Newmar memory surfaced in my addled brain. This memory is, oddly enough, also related to patents.

The US Patent and Trademark Office has a page where one can search for patents by looking for inventors, keywords, or the like. Search queries are facilitated through the use of a simple language. To look for my patents, for example, you might type in something like "in/john and in/seymour and is/wi". This means that the IN (inventor name) field of the patent must contain the words "John" and "Seymour", and that the IS (inventor state) must be WI.

Naturally, they need to provide some examples for how to construct queries. One of their examples is "in/newmar-julie". When I first saw this, I just thought it was a cute joke that someone threw in. Little did I know, since I never actually tried typing this example in.

Incidentally, if you key in their example, you will only bring up two of Newmar's patents. The first of her patents is too old to show up in their online database. No patents before 1976 are at this site.

If you will excuse me, I am going to see if I can find some old episodes of Batman.