Pearl Valley golf resort, Cape Town

After our presentation in Cape Town, we were treated to a golf outing put on by Paarl Media for their customers. We spent two nights in a lavish condo...

 

I got the bedroom with the dance floor. Kurt took the one with the hot tub. 

He and I watched The Big Lebowski on the big screen TV. Dude. It was perhaps a bit unfortunate. I mean that I had watched Crazy Heart first. I probably should have watched Lebowski first, you know. Maybe I could get into the whole zen acting thing before taking on Crazy Heart? Never mind.

 

Regardless of whether it is better to watch Crazy Heart or The Big Lebowski first, the view from this condo was gorgeous. The first two pictures are taken from the back porch. This is a patio with a grill that we didn't get a chance to use. Sigh. The pond is full of frogs that go "plip" in the middle of the night, by the way.

As for the mountains, no one seemed to know the name of the specific mountains. I guess it's kinda like trying to name bars in northern Wisconsin. There's just too many. And who really cares?

"Hello, honey?  I'm getting drunk at a bar in northern Wisconsin."

"Oh yeah?  I'm snorkeling with Kurt in his hot tub. Did you ever notice that he kinda looks like Elvis?"

See what I mean?  It doesn't matter what the name of the bar is.

 

So we all got these cyan golf shirts and orange caps to play golf. I dunno if I mentioned it, but by this time, I had been away from my lovely wife Madelaine for a whole bunch of time, so I was missing her horribly. 

This young lady, by the way, is not my lovely wife Madelaine. This is a lovely lady. And she is named "Madelaine". But she is not my wife. She just spells her name the same way. 

Hence my confusion. I'm sure you will all understand.When my wife cools down, I'll be in a bar in northern Wisconsin.

Anyway, about the golfing. I don't have any pics of the golfing. Sorry. I came to South Africa not knowing two things: I didn't know whether I could speak Africans, and I didn't know whether I could play golf. 

I learned one word in Africans: lekker. It kinda sounds like lacquer and kinda sounds like licquor. It means "good".

I am now better at Africans than I am at golf.

I understand that Jack Nicklaus designed the Pearl Valley golf course. I have sent him a few emails. I am not sure he realizes that it's kinda dry in South Africa. And hot. And I dunno. Maybe if he would have left some directions about putting in a little fertilizer and water? Maybe they could grow some grass in some of those bare spots? He's got to be embarrassed by all those patches of sand where they can't grow grass. It's a pity, really.

 

Here we see the Elvis golf pros. Note the Elvis sunglasses. I still don't have a pair of Elvis sun glasses.No. Honest. I'm not bitter. Kurt scored some points for his golf foursome. Poop head.